Keeping Hope On-Line

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2005
Keeping Hope On-Line
3
Mon, 02-14-2005 - 8:45pm

Hi Board,

This is my first time posting, but I have visited frequently and have read the various discussions posted in the past. Well, the thought I would like to bring up is...just like in "real life" could there be hope after meeting many loser type people online? I,for one,have always tried to keep an open mind- the hopeless romantic side of me,will always believe in fate and soulmates (and that a person may meet them anywhere and anyplace, including the Internet!)

I'm sort of holding out hope for an online "potential" right now but part of me is resisting another emotional bond. We are getting to know each other really slow,which is a good thing,as I have tried to rush and establish "relationships" in the past on an immediate basis. Anybody wanna share thoughts on maybe meeting your soulmate online,long distance online relationships, or just trying to create honest & meaningful bonds (despite lack of f 2 f contact}.If so, how do you cope with it?

Appreciate any and all responses:)

Tuni

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 02-14-2005 - 9:01pm

Why do you not have face to face contact with this people?

I don't think you really can form a lasting romantic r'ship online...you need to meet in person ASAP.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Mon, 02-14-2005 - 9:24pm

Welcome to the board, tuni!!

I am going to assume from your post that you are currently involved online with someone and that it is a Long Distance situation? iVillage has a LDR Board you might want to check out, to find out the various issues these people deal with.

On this Board, we deal with online dating with people in our own cities. And the number 1 rule of OLD is -- meet as soon as possible. The reason for this is that, through our experiences, we know people are very diffent online/in real life. It has been proven time and time again by many of us that until you meet your online interest, you DO NOT know him/her.

I believe it is also an important *rule* of LDR that to hope for any success, there must be an agreement that the two of you will definitely meet and a decision as to when that might be.

Something to think about.

I wish you the best of luck!

amjay

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2004
Mon, 02-14-2005 - 11:10pm

So is your member name just a nickname? Or is it where you live?

If so, and if you're striking up an online friendship with someone in North America or Europe, you should know that it's really, really hard to have a "relationship" with someone via online.

I am like you. I believe in soulmates and romance. I think it can happen via OLD, too.

BUT... that's just how they meet. I honestly do not believe I can fall in love with someone using ONLY online methods, or online methods plus phone calls. You MUST meet someone in person.

Until you actually meet in person, you simply cannot be "in love" with them. Doesn't work that way. You can be a good friend, someone they like to email to and chat with, but no, you can't be in love with each other.

That's my belief, and I'm an idealistic romantic. I just happen to be one that's been online long enough and seen enough that I know how it really works.