Long Term Relationship or Marriage

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2007
Long Term Relationship or Marriage
4
Fri, 01-19-2007 - 9:57pm

I have been in a very, very long term relationship, the reason I've ended it is because I wanted it to turn into a marriage and he didn't want that.

I am on a online dating site and one of the questions on the profile is: what are you looking for - A Date, Long Term Relationship, Marriage.

When I see they don't include marriage on their profile I don't even want to E-mail them back, I just don't want to have another long term relationship without them wanting marriage.

My question is - since I am looking for a man to marry, if they have the choice and don't include marriage as an option on their page am I correct to think that it is not what they are looking for and since I am looking for more (marriage) can I assume they are not wanting what I want.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Fri, 01-19-2007 - 10:30pm
I doubt many DO write Marriage .... thinking its too much. I think dating or long term relationship is fine, just find out early on so you arnet dissapointed.
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Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 01-20-2007 - 3:45am

For me I don't put "marriage" on my online profile but I do want ultimately want that. I think if I focus on creating a close, intimate relationship then marriage will follow. I see the process as the goal rather the "end" of marriage. Make sense?

BTW I'm 53, divorced for 6 yrs, been out of a relationship for 1 year, married once.

Mark

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2007
Sat, 01-20-2007 - 1:13pm

I want to thank everyone that answered. I am new to online dating and since I was in a very long term and disappointing relationship I am just very afraid to go there again. I don't want a relationship to drag on without it moving forward. But I guess just meeting someone for coffee and seeing if we click is just a very, very first step and I will give it a chance without dismissing people immediately. But if we do want to see one another again, I will find out very early where that person wants to take a relationship.

Thanks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
Sun, 01-21-2007 - 1:23am

I try not to check off that box at all, or if I have to check something, I make a point of checking everything.