Meeting someone today

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2005
Meeting someone today
6
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 11:46am

I think I'm addicted to the message boards. Just need to get that off my chest.

Prior to my fling, I had also started the eharmony process with a guy who had sparked my interest, but he took forever to respond to a set of questions (open questions), so I'd given up on him. When I went to reactivate my account, I noticed that he had responded to the questions. In his answer to the first, he wrote in parentheses that he was sorry for the delay. I thought, well I have nothing to lose at this point, so I resumed the process and answered his questions, and included my own parenthetical apology for a long delay.

After those questions were answered, we moved on to the open communication phase, so we started exchanging emails. It's pretty uncanny how similar we are. We grew up in the same area, share many interests, and have a lot of similarities in our backgrounds. On paper, I see a lot of compatibility and have a hunch that this, if it were to develop into something, wouldn't be a shallow tryst.

Anyway, I'm projecting too much--I haven't met the guy yet. But we're meeting this evening. I'm meeting a friend for dinner and he's going to a party, so we found a 30 minute window where we could introduce ourselves to each other and have a quick chat.

Feel free to urge me to keep my feet on the ground, etc...

I'm looking forward to it and will tell you how it goes.

Best,

SBC

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 12:34pm

I think you've got the right idea already... you're meeting for 30 minutes, not placing a lot of expectations on the meet and you know to keep your feet on the ground.


The worst that could happen? You are not attracted and make a new acquaintance. The best? You like him. Of course, there's a range of things that can happen in there but don't worry about that for now. Enjoy the process.


So now all there is to say is good luck!


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 1:47pm

Forget your feet -- have a great time!!! Time enough later on to think about things.

I really like that you didn't make a big deal about the delay in his response. Why fuss at this early stage, right?

amjay

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 7:18pm
Hey - have fun. It sounds like you are on the right track. Let us know how it goes.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2005
Sun, 12-11-2005 - 2:02am

I just returned from meeting a new guy. He was very nice. He actually gave me pomegranates and lemons from his home, which was very sweet. He was a bit nervous and awkward, and the more nervous he seemed, the more he would talk. He's a year younger than me, but he looks VERY young. That coupled with the fact that I didn't feel a romantic spark made it feel as though I was out with my little brother.

So, there might be friendship potential, but he lives quite a distance away, so I'm not going to pursue this one. I hate to admit it, but I thought about my fling and how attracted I was to him during our first meeting. Oh well. Feeling disappointed, but that's part of the process.

I returned home and got a message from a new guy on match. Looks cute, professionally accomplished, also from out of town and relocated here for work. I'll write him back and see where it goes.

Okay, dating is officially no longer fun for me.




Edited 12/11/2005 2:05 am ET by santabarbarachick
Avatar for travkitty
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2003
Sun, 12-11-2005 - 9:41am

If dating is no longer fun, perhaps you ought to take a break until after the holidays? That always seems to reenergize my will to date. If you're comparing any new guys to fling guy, that's a bad thing, IMO. I'm taking my break through January because that's when my whole "am I moving to Florida?" thing will be resolved. Perhaps we should be "on a break" together? LOL! (flashback to Ross & Rachel)

You might see an increase in profiles right after the holidays, anyway, because everyone's singleness will become depressing over the holidays & they'll have a new will to find a mate.




Edited 12/11/2005 9:43 am ET by travkitty
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2005
Sun, 12-11-2005 - 11:38am

Taking a break is probably a good idea. I was excited before I met him and then was totally bummed out afterward. Maybe I'm a romance junkie and didn't even realize it. And I HATE that the fling guy creeped back into my mind, because I felt like I was doing well in moving on and he was appearing less and less in my thoughts.

I will hide my profile for the time being and not begin new contacts with anyone until I can feel more excited and optimistic about dating. There's still the one guy who I've already told I'm only interested in friendship and we will meet on Tuesday. In the last couple of days, I started communicating with two new guys. One sounds eccentric and either a lot of fun or a total weirdo. The other sounds pretty mellow and professional. I will take my time and keep an open mind (sometimes a person will spark your interest when you're least expecting it so why close the door), but also have no major expectations with these two. Other than those three, no more OLD for a while.