Met someone and now he won't talk

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2005
Met someone and now he won't talk
5
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 11:03pm
I'm new to this, so I thought I would give it a try. I started talking to this wonderful guy through a dating site and things went really good. We started off by emailing or talking online to eachother everyday for just over a month. Then we started talking on the phone and everything was still really good. I was really interested in him and he seemed to be just as interested in me. We both talked about how we wanted to pursue a relationship. Then after about a month and a half of talking to eachother we decided to meet. I live in BC and he lives in Alberta. I met him and stayed with him for a few days, even though he worked most of the time everything still went good. We both learned alot from eachother and even though we've both been really hurt in the past still wanted to work on a relationship with eachother. My last night with him, we talked about everything (values, past relationships, us). It was a perfect last night. We talked for about a week after I got home and everything still seemed good. Now a month after meeting him, he rarely talks to me. He says he's busy with work and things and not to worry. I just don't understand why things went so good before and after we met and now he's suddenly quiet with me.
I would appreciate any advice.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 12:22am

Did you talk about when you're getting together again, and how you would make an LDR (long-distance relationship) work? Maybe he's having second thoughts about that aspect of things.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 6:00am

Dunno but could guess:

1. Someone else is in the picture
2. Changed his mind
3. Is juggling a few other online people

Doesn't really matter which of the three - the thing to do is move along (aka - don't contact him - let him contact you). The lesson to be learned is that lengthy first dates don't always translate into relationships.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2005
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 10:29am
Him and I talked many times about how we could deal with a LDR. It worked out easier for me to go and see him for the first time because he couldn't get time off work. After we met, he told me that once he's able to take time off work then he wants to visit me. We started to plan and talk things out and both agreed that this could work. He always reassurred me, that I was the only woman he was talking to and was interested in. Now he's moving to a new place and has been working tons. I'm just hoping that once things settle in his life that he will talk to me. I would like to get a straight answer about what he wants.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 8:33pm

you have a straight answer...

he's ignoring you.

isn't that answer enough?

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 9:54pm

Well, I think it's best if you assume that he's changed his mind for whatever reason. I wouldn't contact him any more. If he gets back in touch with you, then you can see what he says and decide if you want to give it another go.

Sheri