My good friend and I on same site

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
My good friend and I on same site
15
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 4:40pm

I need some advice. My good friend and I are both on a dating website and I have concerns. I know that we will be hearing from some of the same men and I do not want there to be jealousy and competition between my friend and I. I'm sure there are many out there in the same predicament. I know that friendship is more important than guys yada yada yada. Still, I am feeling nervous because what if we both like a guy and both want to go out with him. Do we sit down once a week and go through our list of men that contacted us and divide them up? Sounds silly I know but we are technically competing against one another right? It's a Jewish website and there are slim pickin's:) I'm just not sure how to go about this without coming across as jealous and I definitly don't want any of this to affect our friendship. My worst nightmare is we both have a date with the same guy in the same week! what to do? any thoughts are VERY welcome!

thanks

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:08am
Well if someone is jewish and they want to marry another jewish person, it would be realistic to go to a jewish dating site.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 1:31pm

Interesting that this took theological/ideological turn...I just wanted to give my thoughts on the Jewish dating site and the suggestion that we like to "stick to our own." Personally, it doesn't come down to what my partner believes in terms of religioys beliefs - it's the kids that cause the dilemma for me. I never dated a fellow Jew until I tried out Jdate. And let me just say...men are men are men. Don't care if they are Catholic, Jewish or Protestant. And, btw, my sister did marry someone who is not Jewish, though they are raising their son in a Jewish home. Ultimately, for me, it's about culture and ethnicity NOT simply religion. I do admit it totally limits me in terms of the pond from which I can pluck the right fish:) I'm a very open-minded person but there are some things I simply will not compromise and that includes having a Jewish family. I appreciate everyone's insight.

In terms of my friend and I we still haven't really talked about this. We will see how things go. I will keep all updated:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 2:22pm
It is interesting. While my experience is limited, Jewish people I've known have usually had a strong conviction to raise their children Jewish. I think with most Christian religions, there is some level of blurring the lines and less often will someone say "I am DEFINITELY going to raise my children Methodist!" ;-) As such, the Jewish people have known wound up with someone Jewish or someone very non-religious who was open to different beliefs. While they might have dated around before, when it came down to marriage, they went to the like religion or the non-religion.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:27pm

I'm not Jewish but 80% of the guys I date (including the guy I just recently started dating) are all Jewish, LOL.

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Sat, 02-25-2006 - 9:27pm
I'm not Jewish, but I am Christian, and it's soooo much easier to date someone of the same faith. So to me, yes, it matters what religion the men I date are.



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