Need advise on new guy

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ivsummernights
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2003
Need advise on new guy
7
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 12:24am
I have been dating this guy I met on match.com for about a month. I enjoy his company and would like to continue to get to know him better. However, tonight, I just received an email from him that mentioned he is taking down his profile on match as he is comfortable with dating me and does not want to date others. As we are far from the stage of exclusivity (maybe down the road, but I am still casually dating others and want to at this point) so I am in a bit of a quandary about this matter. Do I need to have a discussion with him? Do I need to respond to this statement? It was not a question, just a statement of fact. I am not ready to take down my profile. What do you think?

Summer

Signatures On
deena33
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 9:03am
I would not respond in an email. If he brings it up again in person I would say - wow - I am flattered - I am not exactly there yet but see potential.
cl_survivingdivorce
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 9:12am
I agree with Deena, I would not want to hurt his feelings, but I certainly would respect the fact that he feels that good about things, but that is his decision. This is not to say you have to do the same. If he brings it up again, then just let him know that you are still not there yet, and that maybe with a little more dating you will. Good for him, if he knows this early, but that doesnt mean you have to.

Goodluck!

Gail:)

whoshouldibe
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 9:27am
Have you all had this discussion yet? Exclusivity, I mean. I wonder if he expects you to take yours down? How do you feel about things between you?
cl_survivingdivorce
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 12:22pm
Well, what if he told her that, to test her? Like to see if she would take her ad down like he did? Just a thought. This is me though. lol I always read more into what guys do. lol


gail;)

ivsummernights
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 1:21pm
No discussion on exclusivity yet. I am comfortable with the pace of slowly getting to know one another and if my feelings were more serious, I would just hide or take down my profile without a second thought. It may become exclusive, but after 4 dates in 4 weeks it seems a little premature, you know? I wonder if he expects me to reciprocate too, that is why I posted the question.
ivsummernights
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 1:25pm
The thought crossed my mind too, but I hate to make assumptions about a person's motives. Usually it is the other way around...me falling too quickly for a guy and being in the opposite seat...So, that is why this caught me off guard. I will just wait and see...;-)

ivsummernights
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2003
In reply to: ivsummernights
Need advise on new guy
 Mon, 08-18-2003 - 1:28pm
Yes, that is probably the best way to handle things now. Keep it light and open for possibilities. Thanks.
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