Need help writing a clever response

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Need help writing a clever response
Wed, 10-29-2003 - 10:51pm
First some background info...

Some posters might recall that about a month ago I intiated contact with someone online. M responded with an email. He made reference to info in my profile and seemed quite interested in getting to know me. He gave me his phone number and I called a few days later. We had a great conversation and he mentioned meeting in person several times. He said he'd call the next day to arrange when and where to meet. He didn't call. A couple of days later he sent an email explaining that he hadn't lost interest, that he'd still like to meet but that he's very shy and that it takes him a long time to get up the courage to meet anyone - not just me. He then addded that in the meantime I might find somebody else and that would be fine. Never heard from him again.

Fast forward three weeks...

Today I added another photo to my profile and decided to make it my new primary photo. It's black and white and the most flattering photo I have of myself (I think). I did not remove the other two photos that I already had posted.

This evening guess who sends an email? That's right the elusive and shy M. What does he write? "Nice photo - very cute. Are you a blonde or a brunette?"

It seems clear that he doesn't recognize me from the new photo. It's also clear that he hit the "send email" button under my photo and didn't even open the profile. If he had he would have known from the other 2 photos (and the little check box that describes physical appearance) that I am brunette. He might have even realized who I am.

I want to respond to him but I want to be clever about it. One thought was to paraphrase the above paragraph (i.e. "It seems clear that you don't recognize me from the new photo...")

Another thought was writing something along the lines of, "Thank you for the compliment; however, before I answer your question re. my hair colour I was wondering, which part of my essays caught your interest the most?" The point would be to get him to view the profile and realize who I am. Or I could just suggest that he view my profile and then he'd get his answer.

Another idea...For some reason I had saved our initial emails in a folder I titled "men who disappeared." So I was thinking of replying by forwarding our correspondences.

Some of you might say to just ignore him but I really, really feel like coming up with a clever comeback.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Wed, 10-29-2003 - 11:13pm
Hi jhoover,

I'm usually much nicer than this, but this guy is a toad.

I think that if I were in an appropriately mean mood I would write back simply "I see you've gotten over your shyness" and attach your previous correspondence.

I am evil! ;-)

You are awesome for wanting to send a clever response!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2003
Thu, 10-30-2003 - 12:14am

Oh boy this is great!

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-30-2003 - 12:10pm

I'm in the ignore him camp.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-30-2003 - 2:28pm
Here are my suggestions:

(from a friend of mine)

Oh - well when you first wrote to me weeks ago I was a brunette but now that I'm a blonde I don't have time for you anymore. Good luck!"

or (my idea, not as good)

"Oh - well, um I'm just too SHY to share that - and I know you can relate. So charming to hear from you again."