"Never Been Married"
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"Never Been Married"
| Sun, 03-20-2005 - 11:16am |
Sparkle's "living with roommates" post (and I'm with her on that one) made me think of another one: "Never been married."
| Sun, 03-20-2005 - 11:16am |
I'm VERY wary of the "never been marrieds" in my age range (37-50).
I dated an NBM who I met in real life for two years who insisted he just hadn't met the right woman. He had never even LIVED with a woman, and had been through two very long-term relationships; six and eight years each. For the two years we dated, it was excruciating "on-again/off-again -- let's get married/I feel pressured we have to break up..." agony. It was an incredibly difficult relationship to get over, but in retrospect, THANK GOODNESS I was not the first woman this guy had ever lived with!! Yikes!
I'm basing my opinion purely on this experience of mine; I'm curious to see if anyone out there has some valid reasons why someone would go that long before making even SOME kind of commitment.
Tracy
Hi Stephanie...
Pianoguy has been married twice.....and survived
There is a opening line to a book I read a while ago. It starts with a woman who is just finalizing her divorce and said "now that I live alone, it's amazing how all of my annoying habits have disappeared."
Ain't it the truth!!!!!
Tracy
Is this a "great thread"? I can't help getting emotional and honestly, I think your comment sounds discriminatory. Some people including myself aren't so lucky finding "the one"s in their early ages, some are determined to be single. Some others are not but for some unfortunate reasons, they get passed 35 y.o. w/o having a luck to get married with.
You never know why some aren't married before 35 and it is not your business whether they are still single or married before.
So why do you have to segregate these unlucky people just because they haven't got married yet? Or do these all people have to be labeled as queers or weirdos or something negative? I do not understand your intention of this thread at all. Some others get married and get divorce years later, so what is the point? No matter married before or not, we are all trying to find someone very special, and does "never been married" matter? You might be a lucky person who found a husband before 35, but don't assume that things are that way all the time to many others, and I know many great single (never married before) people who are not weird.
Sure, a "never been" can get into a good relationship and work fine as a married guy. I know a guy who's never been married, 40ish, and he's a super guy whose present gf lives with him. They're quite happy as a couple and in living together, and might well wind up married (it has only been a while for them).
I'm a NBM and have no fear. I lived with a wonderful woman for several years and am really quite house-trained. LOL
With a guy past 30-35ish who's never lived with a woman, there's going to be some growing pains and a transition period, but I think that if he's really into her and dedicated to making it work out, there would be little if any problem in adapting to married life.
I think that anyone can adapt to married life if that is truly what they want to do, but they have to WANT to be in the relationship and know that there will be issues to adapt to, to make the partnership work.
Yet if they are a very selfish, "Me, me" person, and are not willing to make compromises that are needed in a new marriage, then it won't work for them.
Yet my last statement could also apply to divorced people also who will not compromise, who are usually harboring bitterness from the past relationships and are just not emotionally ready for a true relationship anyway!
Sunshine
<<< I'm curious to see if anyone out there has some valid reasons why someone would go that long before making even SOME kind of commitment>>>
I'm 40, never been married.
I had my son when I was 24 and put my dating life on hold until he was raised. I didn't want a series of "uncles" in and out of his life. I had the occasional date over the years, but chose not to pursue anything serious, because he had to come first.
I started dating again about 3 years ago.
If a guy passes over me because of some percieved "issue" because I've never been married, well, he can pass on by.
Personally, I think this, the roommate thing, job, income, etc. are all just excuses to pass on someone, because in OLD it's easier to click on to the next one than to actually put yourself out there to meet someone.
Getting ready to go to SD but wanted to tap in. I agree, another reason to click next on OLD.