New here & pissed off

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2004
New here & pissed off
25
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 2:37pm

Hi Ladies-


I was given a head's up about this board by someone who was posting to

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 2:47pm

Welcome.

First, on line dating is a numbers game. Secondly, don't read into it so much. If he calls you and you decide to meet out, GREAT and if he doesn't don't worry about it. Just move on to the next guy. Until you actually meet in person there is no relationship and don't or try not to be disapointed. That's how the on line dating world works. Write to at least a few guys at once this way one or several will call. Providing you like the phone conversation then meet them out right away. The key is to meet as quickly as possible with out building it up. Even if you go out once and hit it off, keep dating. A lot of guys will act interested even on the first or second date and you never hear from them again. Until you've established a dating pattern anything could happen.

Good luck.

SP

Avatar Image"The Small Peanu
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 4:29pm

What you've seen is absolutely normal for online dating - where the anonymity causes people to abandon normal social manners.

I strongly recommend getting into the habit of not getting attached to the people through a lot of emails or phone calls before meeting in person. Strive to keep it to no more than 3 or 4 emails/calls and then set a brief time to meet. Coffee works good because it's cheap and quick if things do not go well.

Follow SP's recommendations - that's exactly what it's like out there in online dating. The sooner you can learn the rules the quicker you'll adapt.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 7:33pm
OLD is a whole other dating world. Of course similiarities to real life dating - but OLD has these quirks like you mentioned that are cons of it. Definetly give it a chance, and just keep an open mind. I think many times people go into OLD thinking they will have a relationship since there are so many options. Wrong, its almost the opposite and similiar to real world - hit or miss. Use it as an avenue to meet people, and if something more develops - fantastic. Just keep your expectations of OLD to "great way of meeting people" and I Think you'll have a lot more fun. You'll dismiss these guys like you mentioned quickly and understand its just part of OLD. Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 8:20pm
a piece of advice I can think of: don't waste your time dealing with a liar.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 11:08pm

Hi Sparkle,

Sorry this has happened to you, but this IS the place to find out the 4-1-1 on OLD! If you can, go back and read some of the other threads here. The one posted on February 12th called "The Red Flag List" -- the great people here listed some Real Truths that would be good for you to read and heed! There are Many other good threads; some on ghosting (or "vaporizing", as I call it) and also about just How many ways these people can find to be socially unacceptable!

This is a good place to learn how to put that "Armadillo Armor" around your heart and feelings and learn to have absolutely NO expectations of any kind per OLD dates! Go, have fun, come home.

Per the one your are talking to now...Too much gaming going on, too many red flags...Ding! Next! YOU deserve better.

Truly,
Cupcake

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2004
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 1:50am

Thanks for the response, I really appreciate it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2004
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 1:51am

Thank you!!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2004
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 1:57am
That was so funny!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 7:08am

That's not my picture -- it's a photo of a guy who was fired from Walmart

http://desmoinesregister.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20050107/NEWS08/501070357/1001/NEWS

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2004
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 8:20am

Figures he's from where I grew up.....lol.

Lisa

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