new here..need some advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2003
new here..need some advice
2
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 9:25pm
Ok, so i've been chatting on msn with a guy i met online. We met for coffee 3 weeks ago, which seemed to go well, and have been chatting on and off since. was supposed to go out 2 weeks ago, i had to cancel, babysitter back out.
we chatted on tuesday night and i asked him out, he said yes, we talked about going out on sunday, but both of us needed to check our schedules.
Well today's friday, he hasn't been online since tuesday on msn.
Do i send him an email?? (We've never emailed each other before)
i don't want to look desperate, but i have been enjoying talking to him, and enjoyed our one date.
what do i say if i fo email him?
Help please, new to this dating thing, was in a relationship for 10 yrs..now in completely forgien territory
thanks
Lilypie Baby Days
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 10:57pm

That's the one thing I dislike about MSN Messenger...that you can't send offline messages like you can with Yahoo. If I wanted to send an e-mail, I'd send an e-mail, you know? But I'm on messenger to send an IM! lol

Anyway, I think it's perfectly acceptable to send a quick e-mail, and say something like, "Hey...just wanted to see how you were doing...hadn't heard from you for a while. I'm free this weekend if you want to chat..." and leave it at that, let him decide what "chat" means...if he likes you and wants to see you again, he'll respond with a "let's go out", if he's not so sure, he'll say...I don't know, something other than that! lol

This is a very common issue with OLD...one which I dont' like much. As if there's not enough games in the dating word, now you have to decipher whether not being online on IM actually means something or not...lol

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2004
Sat, 09-10-2005 - 8:34am

I am not on match.com anymore. Nothing ever came of it. My profile on aol allows me (for me) more specifics and gets more attention. I hang in chat rooms sometimes that have specific interests in mind. Ive done most of my "meeting" through IM contact. I never ended up getting a real life meeting through Match.com but then again, i didn't wink first or respond to winks. I did respond to emails...but usually they didn't live nearby or for whatever reason..didnt continue with email.

Ive had much more success talking through IM and getting immediate response and finding out at least through their profile on aol and their personality in IM ..much more success..it works for me.

Ya never know what "clown" or "nonclown" will pop up...i love IMs. Entertaining on a lonely night at least LOL I never IM first. I love the traditional male-female pursue-pursued scenario.

Works for me, but then again...i am not in a long term relationship....yet..but its my way of at least getting to that point.
Lizzie