Is this a new twist...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Is this a new twist...
18
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:22pm
Is it the new 'thing' for guys to give their phone numbers and expect the girl to call them? Also, I just received an email from "Too Much Info" guy and he says '..its up to you if you would like to meet,keep in touch'...so is the ball now in the woman's court as far as contacting and deciding to meet??!! What's going on with society!! Out of the last 6 guys from online, 4 have given me their phone first and said to call them. I'm confused as to what to do.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:35pm
Been my experience that women prefer to get the man's # first, rather than give out their number - I didn't think that was anything new.
A man's got to do what a man's got to do.
A woman must do what he can't.

MS
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2005
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:35pm
Pretty simple. Call them if you want to. Don't call them if you don't want to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2003
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:36pm

When a man sends me his number I will reply with my number and tell them that I'm a little old fashioned and prefer that the man do the calling first. If they call then I know they are interested, if not, next. I've had men tell me that times have changed and they think it's ok for women to call men. But, I never call a man until I have known him for a while, and then only if he's expecting my call. Never to just chit chat. Tattoo man always emails me when he gets up in the morning and asks me to call him. Simply because he doesn't know if I'm busy at work. In the evening he usually calls or emails and asks me to call him if he's working.

As for "too much info man", sounds like the ball is in your court. Remember to listen to your first guy instinct...it's usually right.

Good Luck,
Libra

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:39pm

I'm torn. I can see your point - the guy should do the pursuing.

But in the world of OLD, I think as far as safety goes, the woman should call him and block her number.

Of course, there is the argument, why behave any differently than you would if you met him in real life, right?


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:52pm

I don't think of this as anything new. I know that men do have that thought that many women are not comfortable giving out their number to a near stranger so they give the woman their number and say she can call him. I don't think it is a big deal but I usually do something similar to libra and say that I prefer the guy to call first.

But I do have to disagree becaue I DO treat OLDs differently than guys I meet IRL. Guys from RL, I generally meet through work, friends or common activities so I already know something about them or even know someone who knows them very well. I feel more comfortable giving out my # or address to someone like that than to some complete stranger I met online. If I were picking up guys in bars or at random, then no, I would treat it the same as an OL meet.




Edited 6/20/2005 4:53 pm ET ET by vexer_hw

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2005
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 5:00pm

I think that most men online are considering the "safety" factor when they offer up their numbers. Many women (like myself) are not comfortable giving their phone number to a complete stranger.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2003
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 5:26pm

<>

That's the way I view it. To me it's real life, the same rules apply.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2005
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 5:33pm

If you don't want to call first, simply give him your phone number and tell him to call.
That worked for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2005
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 7:35pm

Hi Donna,

The same thing has been happening to me with the guys giving me their phone numbers. I'm not really sure what it means! I haven't read the other posts on this thread yet so it will be interesting to see the other opinions of our enlightened group!

One OLD guy said, well you can block your number if you don't want me to have it. Well I only give my cell out and wouldn't give my home number to a stranger even if I had one (which I choose not to have, as my cell is fine!).

I wonder if these are guys who just don't want to commit to having to call you and are just being lazy or what... I'm not really sure...

Sunshine

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Tue, 06-21-2005 - 9:48am
When I first "met" my boyfriend online, he asked me if I'd like to call him instead of continuing to type on IM (he's a slow typist lol).

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