New, WWYD in this situation??
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New, WWYD in this situation??
| Fri, 10-07-2005 - 5:02pm |
Hello there everyone. In a nutshell, I was engaged last summer to a man who abruptly ended things (via email, he said there were no hard feelings, just wasn't going to work) a month or so before our wedding. It has been hard for me to deal with. Well, recently I got on an online dating site and what do you know. There he was. (We didn't meet online, by the way, and he doesn't live close to me) He has not acknowledged that he's seen me on there by viewing me or sending me anything. So... if you were in my situation, what would you do? Would you ignore him? Would you click on him? Would you say hi, how's it going? It's been a year since we've communicated. I don't know if I should acknowlege him out of politeness, or just ignore him. I still have very strong feelings for him. Not sure what to do... any input would be appreciated!! thanks!

Since he broke the engagement over email (abruptly) then I would abruptly ignore him!! I'm sure the reason you are online to meet men is not to hook up with your EX but to meet "NEW" men! (smile)
If there will be any contact, let him be the first to initiate and even then I'm not sure I would reply!
ditto!
Don't sell yourself short; remember how you felt a year ago not how you feel now. They call them an EX for a reason and what he did was very cold & insensitive (sounds like your better off; blessing in disguise).
SP
Just ignore him. You will come out looking like the classier one. Take the high road on this one. Both of you have already said everything that you need to say to each other. Don't be a doormat and talk to him again and subject yourself to more abuse from this mongruel. If you tell him that you have seen his profile it will just feed his ego more. He will be thinking he dumped this chick cold then she sees me online at a dating site, and she actually communicates with me again. This girl doesn't think much of herself he will think. Even if you email him or message him just to tell him off he will wonder why you still care enough about him to even get angry at him after all he has done to you. Don't bother with this skank. I am really sorry that happened to you, but just be glad he dumped you because from his actions he is not a nice guy. If you had stayed with him, and he had married you imagine all the sh*t he would have done to you. Sometimes what appears to be a loss of someone that you mistakenly thought cared for you is a blessing in disguise. I think you will probably meet a much more honest and handsome man than your ex. Remember this Madge always knows best, "Nothing takes away the past like the future."
R.I.
Russian:
Your post couldn't have been more right!
This guy is "kind of" a jerk? Understatement of the year. He is most likely sociopathic actually. (seriously). You dodged a big HUGE bullet. So instead of feeling sad(if and when you do)...its time to look at things another way. "whewwwwwwwwwwwwwww what a relief". and also look at what you might have missed and learned from those mistakes if you can find any and all. If he hid his real self well...he is a sociopath...if he didn't hide things and there were truly signs this was a false/fantasy relationship...then you have something to learn from it.
I am sorry you got dumped the way you did and when you did...how horrible...but THANK GOD you werent with him a minute longer.....he is troubled or you both really only had a relationship hanging on a thread and heads in sand. Neither is a good scenario.
yay you..ignore that wackjob. Living well is the best revenge even if they never find out about it. You'll know =)
Lizzie
Hi Jaye,
Two easy ways to remember what to do Now, and in the future...try these out and see if they 'fit":
1. They call it the Past because it has P-A-S-S-E-D. Let it stay there, don't dig up what you do Not want. If he Did respond, what do You want out of this?
2."Do Nothing and have Nothing to Regret". Make this your non-yoga mantra and when you think of sending an ugly note, making a call fueled by Jose Cuervo (or any of his 'family members'!),etc., just "Don't and say ya Did", as we say here in Texas! You will Inevitably look back and see how much you saved in Not doing it--Including your Pride!
He probably does know you are online, might have browsed you through a friend's profile. His ego is Soooo big that he thinks "she wants me"--HA! He obviously thinks he is Matt Damon in a Brad Pitt suit. You, Young Lady, can do Wayyyyy better than that! TG you found out before you mistakenly married this mutt butt!!!
Hold out...I met TM on Match and the last 6 months together have been great. Yes, we have had adjustments, but never have I felt it all happen so wonderfully, joyously ,Easily...as it should be! There is a Fish in the sea for you...keep casting!
"Date like a Man"...keep on going til someone gives you a Fine reason to Stop. Don't attach to anyone, and date a few at once. When I met TM, I was dating 3 men--so busy that the phone is Always ringing, so you do not have Time to think! and Fun ,too!
Roll On, Little Rock
Best o Luck!
Truly,
Cupcake