New...but not

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2003
New...but not
1
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 1:03pm
I have posted here a very few times but have been actively reading this board for a few years. I have been doing OLD off and on for about 3 years with a couple of short relationships and one fairly significant one of 19 months. I reach a point where I say I will never do it again and inevitably go back and sign up for a month. Match.com is my site of preference. There are times I think i could write a book about my experiences with OLD.
One thing I have found with men in my age group (45-55), I am 48, is the almost immediate references, innuendoes, whatever you want to call them about sex that these men say. I could say "the sky is blue" and they turn it into something sexual. And I have found it with men I have met in real life, too, not just on dating sites. It is almost like they have to prove that they can still "do it". It gets very discouraging.
Well at the beginning of March I decided to give Match another try. I got an email from a guy and we talked...email, phone...for about a week. No sexual talk at all. We met after about a week. Still no sex talk. Then Sat. night we had our first official date (he picked me up). It was so refreshing as there was still no sex talk. He is older (57) than my "norm" but I figured, age is just a number, and why not give it a whirl. He is one of the nicest people I have ever met. He kissed me for the first time that night and even that was normal....no half-hour, sweaty, panting, tongue halfway to my navel kiss. But also not a simple peck. It was just very nice.
Now, I am not sitting waiting every minute for his call. Or checking my email constantly for word from him. When he calls it is nice. When there is an email it is great. If he suddenly ghosts, ya, I would be dissapointed but I have BTDT so much over the last 4 years that nothing surprises me.
It is just so nice to have finally met someone that is more on the nice, normal end of the spectrum.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2006
In reply to: ljdmmom
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 2:26pm

Good For you! I have been like that lately.. I get discouraged then I go back...I have been on match before, but just last week signed up for Perfectmatch.com. We'll see...It's very discouraging isn't it?

BUT I'm glad you have found someone who is 'normal' and you are beeing really cool about it..THAT"S even better as far as I'm concerned..Myself, I hate it when I become obessive over a guy.. it's nuts!

Good luck with him, I hope it works out for you both..

Keep us posted!

Lisa

boston.png Boston Girl image by EmmaLee192