Ok, I don't want to jinx anything...

Avatar for northwestwanderer
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Ok, I don't want to jinx anything...
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Sat, 05-06-2006 - 11:56am

...but I had a *really* good first meet last night. I responded to this guy's ad a few days ago on CL due to a shared intered in music and the Red Sox (he just moved here from the Boston area, near where I grew up) and we talked on the phone yesterday afternoon and decided to meet kind of spur of the moment before my choir's dress rehearsal last night. I don't know...I just have a very good feeling about him. We are seeing each other again tonight for a late dinner after my concert tonight.

I have another first meet this afternoon that I'm now less enthusiastic about but I know better than to put all my eggs in one basket this early on.

Who knows how this will turn out but it's nice to have the butterflies AND know that the interest is mutual ;-).

Sheri

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Registered: 03-15-2004
Sat, 05-06-2006 - 2:20pm

Ooooh! TWO dates with him in 24 hours!?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Sat, 05-06-2006 - 5:15pm
Woo hoo!
heather 5-18-10
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Registered: 05-23-2005
Sun, 05-07-2006 - 3:07am

Wow Sheri, a date and a meet on the same day...I'm soooo impressed. I'm getting inspired here to dust off the ol' profile and have another go;-P


Keep us all posted.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-07-2006 - 2:07pm

Well, maybe I did jinx it after all. I just didn't have the same vibe last night...but I was exhausted after my concert, so that could be it, too. We'll see...I'm reasonably sure I'll be seeing him again soon although we didn't set another firm date.

Sheri

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Registered: 03-18-2005
Sun, 05-07-2006 - 8:07pm

Bummer! What do you think changed between the first and second date besides you being a bit tired?

 
 
Avatar for northwestwanderer
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-08-2006 - 1:02pm

I think it's mainly that he wants to get too serious, too soon. He feels that the immediate strong connection between us means we should go right to being a couple, and I'm just not there yet, by a LONG shot. He's pushing a lot of my scared/hurt buttons, too...we have been very open with each other and he's very straight and upfront and that's kind of freaking me out. NOT that I don't want that in a partner, but it's just too much too soon.

He's kind of like a force of nature and I just don't know if I can go along with it without getting overwhelmed, if that makes any sense. He's very, very open, emotional and talkative, seems to be the type of guy who will help anyone in need (so he's kind and giving), yet very alpha male at the same time. As I write this, I realize that yes, I'm feeling overwhelmed by him at the moment and feel I need to step back. I've just never been one to believe in the whole love at first sight thing, and whenever I've gone with that feeling, I've ended up getting burned, so I'm not inclined to do so now.

Sheri

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Registered: 03-18-2005
Mon, 05-08-2006 - 1:12pm

I’m in the same boat – but if he’s the right guy he’ll respect that for you it takes time and he won’t push. Someone who can’t see that doesn’t have respect for you only their needs.

 
 
Avatar for northwestwanderer
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-08-2006 - 1:56pm

Yes, that's how I'm feeling...I need to stick to what's comfortable for me, and if he's right for me, he'll respect that and have patience. There are two other guys I want to see again at this point...I'm just not ready to foreclose those possibilities so early on.

Hope you get your third date!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Mon, 05-08-2006 - 2:04pm

NW thenbe honest w/ him. Tell him you feel the same connection and it feels good but at the same time can be scary.. YOu would like to move forward w/ him but baby steps/take it one day at a time and move slowly

if he is what he says he is and really feels it, then he will respect YOUR feelings enought to take it slower...

be honest and communicate.. if you haven't already

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Mon, 05-08-2006 - 4:15pm
Well, Sheri - don't let your concern of getting hurt or of NOT getting hurt cloud this here.
heather 5-18-10

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