Online Dating is too much work!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Online Dating is too much work!
4
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 12:18am

Is it me or does it feel like WORK and it takes so much time? I'm really getting tired with screening profiles and going through emails and then messaging with perfect strangers...to find out I'm totally bored with the conversations and then to feel nothing...I'm not excited...and yet if I don't do it I can't meet anyone in real life because I don't go out enough to meet people....or the only people I meet are people I work with and I've done my share of dating co-workers that turned disastorous....and to top it off I'm not getting younger and so I hear my Darn clock TICKING TICKING away...Sorry about the venting...Anyone feel this way???

Tea

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 12:50am
Yeah, I feel the same way. The whole getting-to-know process in the initial emails is too much work. It's tedious. I usually go in spurts. For example, I'll only check those emails and reply to people every other day or every two days. That way I'm not doing it round the clock and letting it dictate my whole evening. IF I get past the initial getting to know and a couple dates with a guy then I'll give them my direct email address so I don't have to log into OLD all the time. Logging in is getting to be a little aversive! lol
Hang in there (that's what I keep telling myself)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 10:48am
Absolutely it is work.
heather 5-18-10
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2003
Wed, 11-08-2006 - 9:44pm
I agree with you. I wouldn't bother with IM'ing. I would just send a couple of emails back and forth and if they don't suggest getting together or exchanging numbers, then move on to the next guy. I posted an ad on craigslist this Thursday and got over 100 responses, many from seemingly great guys who are good-looking too. There's no chance in this world I could correspond with them all so I answered maybe 30 that really stood out to me and that didn't seem shady. I'm drained and overwhelmed. I feel like taking a break but don't want to possibly pass up the right guy. I may already have by not responding to the other 70 or so but what can you do? I spoke to one guy on the phone earlier tonight whose email really spoke to me and who seems really nice and we're going out Saturday night. I'm crossing my fingers he might possibly be the right guy for me so I can let the others fall behind. Has anyone else heard of over 100 responses from a craiglist ad? It just boggles my mind as I've never posted an ad on craigslist before nor do I think I will again for a long time to come.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Thu, 11-09-2006 - 12:31am

I'm trying out CL right now too....I'm getting alot of responses too...although there's quite a bit of good looking guys that responded to my ad....I'm finding it hard to sift through it all and still feeling unexcited about it....I don't know what's wrong with me...

I actually had a coffee meet tonight with a guy I met from yahoo personal but we ended up not connecting because I told him to meet me at the wrong location. I completely forgot which location I told him to meet me at until I got back to reread the message history. We never exchanged phone number because I told him to email me if plans changed....because I'm leery with giving out my cell number in case I don't like what I see in person I don't want him to call me after the meet...so when I got back I logged on line to appologized...he signed on about 2 hours later and forgave me...and we resett the date to Friday and he gave me his cell #...but to be honest...i don't even care if it works out or not...because I'm finding very hard to feel anything with these guys I meet from the internet. I haven't been doing this for too long or dated enough to feel burnout..so I'm wondering why I'm not as excited as some you are on here...I want to feel something but absolute NADA!!

Tea