Online personals DO work--have faith

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2003
Online personals DO work--have faith
1
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 6:20pm

Hi All,

I have posted here a few times, a long time ago, when I was dating around and frustrated. I decided to post here today to give those of you who read this and may not be having much luck with online dating some hope. I know I always got some reassurance hearing about success stories when I wasn't having any.

First of all--a little on me. I'm 24, female, and a graduate student at a large university, and I am also a teaching assistant for the undergrads too. I am busy and have a pretty good group of friends, so I've never been one to need a man...but I've dated a lot because I like male companionship and like kissing ;). I've had quite a few serious, long-term relationships, and was content with several, but always broke things off because I always felt like I was settling. After my last serious relationship ended (about 8 months ago) I pretty much gave up on finding Mr. Right and instead started focusing on me, going out with friends, and forgot about finding true love...I didn't think it was out there for me.

My sister recently got engaged to the man she met on Yahoo personals, and my best riend has met quite a few great friends online, so I gave Yahoo personals a shot so I could maybe meet some new guys to go on dates with, to "stay in the game" and have some fun. I also must mention...I am a writer, and love to write about my own relationships for my stories...so dating was always something I loved to do just for story material alone ;). The writer in me also gets me disappointed in love...as I tend to believe fairy tales should translate to every day life (ie--fairy-tale romance, in my mind, has always been what I wanted, and no man I ever met satisfied me in that way, of course).

A few months after posted my personal (and many OK dates with other guys later), I got an e-mail from "CJ." We started talking on the phone soon after the first e-mail...from the first night he called me until the night of our first date, we talked on the phone every day for at least 3 hours...usually closer to 5 hours. We met 3 weeks after first talking on the phone, and it was love at first sight...plus we already knew TONS about eachother. We became exclusive later that week, and we are still together, totally in love...and he is saving up for a ring!

He is everything I ever wanted but never thought I'd find...the "Prince Charming" women today are told do not exist...my soul mate. And he was just waiting there for me online, and he found me.

Before him, my love life was pretty much a disaster...things changed dramatically in a very short period of time. I hope this story brings some of you some hope. All I can say is...post a personal ad that is totally honest...be the person you are right away, so you seed out the people who may not like you a few months down the road. For example, in my ad I admitted I was emotional, feisty, stubborn, and sensitive. I'm sure a lot of guys read that and went right back searching ;). I told "CJ" everything about myself before we met...stuff people warn you should never talk about (ex-boyfriends, neuroses, bad habits, etc)...and he did the same--and we fell in love so easily.

Good luck all...if I can meet someone who puts up with, and loves, all my crap, anyone can meet someone special!

Red

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 8:23am
Thank you so much for sharing your story... It's wonderful to hear that online dating can be successful. Congrats!
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