Photo vs. No Photo

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2008
Photo vs. No Photo
8
Tue, 01-12-2010 - 11:26pm
So what do you think, if I add a photo to my profile, will it cut down on the number of completely unattractive men that send me flirts/emails?
Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 7:27am

No, posting a photo will not cut down on unattractive men contacting you. You will still get emails from men with whom you have nothing in common, and who are physically very unappealing. I don't get it, but there you have it.

When I see a profile of a man without a photo, I assume he is unattractive, or really just isn't representing his age accurately. I also think some of them are married or in relationships and are just having fun. I think a few are sincerely just shy, or for whatever reason, feel uncomfortable having their photo posted for the world to see.

I think you will see an increase of responses if you post a photo. For instance, I don't even search for profiles without a photo.

I don't think being on two sites is desperate. I am on match.com and was on POF for about 8 months last year. Many people have had a lot of luck with POF and even Craig's List, but I found the quality on POF to be sorely lacking in my neck of the woods.

You might also want to search a man's username on Google. You'd be surprised to find that some of them are on many, many sites, including so-called adult dating sites. When I was on two sites, I at least changed my screen name.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2009
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 11:49am

Some men reply to ads regardless of whether there is/is not a photo.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 11:55am

I think if you're attractive & post a photo, you will definitely get an increase in emails and probably also from unattractive people--for some reason, even if a guy is really unattractive he never thinks "OH, I won't go for that hot girl, because she's too good for me" he just thinks "wow, she's hot, I want to be w/ her." All the sites say that you get an increase in "business" if you will when you have a photo, which is probably true. Right now I don't have a photo since I just don't have any photos of me (see post below) and I haven't gotten any activity since I "unhid" my profile on Sunday. However, when I first signed up last summer, even w/ no photo, I still had people contact me, so maybe it's just a slow time. Right now I don't even really have time to sift through the guys & contact them.

I don't know what guys think, but when I see guys w/ no photo, it's not that I assume that they are all unattractive, since they might either be shy or just kind of lazy, but I do worry that they are. I did contact one guy last summer, we emailed for a little while & talked on the phone once, and then I just decided I didn't want to do OLD at that time. He didn't have a photo then, but recently I found he added one and it's not so much his face, but he has one of those bodies where all the weight goes to his gut so he looks like he's 9 mos. pregnant. I find that more unattractive than a guy who's somewhat overweight, but it's kind of spread out so he still looks in proportion. So that's what you take the risk for when one or the other doesn't have a photo--when you actually meet, someone might be disappointed. I guess I'd rather have a guy look at my profile and decide I'm not for him where I haven't invested anything emotionally, rather than spend the time doing emails & calling and getting my hopes up, then when he sees me, he says "no thanks".

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 1:24pm

"...it's not so much his face, but he has one of those bodies where all the weight goes to his gut so he looks like he's 9 mos. pregnant. I find that more unattractive than a guy who's somewhat overweight, but it's kind of spread out so he still looks in proportion. "

OK, I spit out my coffee reading this. Yeah, I've got plenty of those guys in my area, too. What is with men in their 50s?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 7:19pm
My ex BIL used to look like that and he's only 51--he started going to the gym & in the last year or so, he lost 80 lbs! Now I could go to the gym for a year and lose about 5 lbs, but then again, he's a foot taller than me plus it's that male vs. female metabolism thing. But I could use him as inspiration.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2009
Wed, 01-13-2010 - 9:04pm
You hit the nail right on the head about the photo question!! Many, many people's pics I have seen online are at least 5yrs. old. I always like to check out their additional photos if they have any and look at the differences between them. I had talked with a guy online that only had one pic. I even asked how recent it was. Well, things got to the stage of meeting. I spent 5 min. searching all 8 faces of the guys at the bar we were meeting at and couldn't recognize the guy. He finally came up to me and I then learned the pic was 10 yrs. old!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2008
Sun, 01-24-2010 - 2:02am
IMAO I prefer a photo and a full length photo not a professional shot either. I want to have a good idea that this person meets my aesthetic scale. Fat does not cut it! That is why I hate "face" shots this isn't 1800 where everyone was covered up and getting enough to eat was a big attractor. If they don't then
I think that perhaps they did not have a good photo or did not have a webcam.
Another big ? is no photo and say that they are average in looks.
xvra
Hornycomments.com for myspace adult comments
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2008
Tue, 01-26-2010 - 6:13pm
That is why there are so many great looking pics in the ads because they are MODELS! Then you hit reality.:(
xvra
Hornycomments.com for myspace adult comments