Profiles can be soo wrong!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Profiles can be soo wrong!
20
Tue, 12-08-2009 - 7:57am

I emailed a guy about two weeks ago and he emailed me back pretty fast.

His profile was very long, but very charming. We had a lot of the same values and wants in life. Liked a lot of the same things. It was very direct, very charming. A little quirky, but I like that.

He called me, he seemed very nice, funny, smart. We have a similar sense of humor. He told me about his kids, his job, asked me a lot of questions. After having read his profile and talked to him, I was definitely willing to meet.

We met last Monday, he was a little late because he was taking his parents to the airport (how cute). We talked, laughed, it was great...

And then...he starts getting all "hands on". A little bit was cute, but then it started to be too much. He walked me to my car and started getting a little too hands on again. I stopped him and told him he had to 'earn' these things...

Then he decides I'm his 'girl'. He starts to call me every day, but wants phone sex! I NEVER gave any indication that this is something that I am into. I don't even like it. He calls me and goes on and on, very explicitly, so I hung up. He called back, I didn't pick up and he left a message asking what happened. After 20 minutes I called back and explained that he had gone too far, I didn't even know him, if he'd like to get to know ME we could do that, but this is not cool. He chilled a little bit, then I told him good night.

He called a few more times, we played phone tag. Then Sunday night, the same thing...he started in on the explicit talk, I asked him to chill, finally had to hang up on him. He again called back, and I restated the issue. Then he started up again!

He told me he wasn't having much luck on Match...now I know why!!! The guy was married for 18 years...now I think I know why he's divorced!

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2009
Tue, 12-08-2009 - 10:18am

So you got yourself a sex-starved playboy wanna be, huh? Wow. Just goes to show you can't put any stock in what people say in their profiles. He *might* have all of those values that seem to mesh with yours, but perhaps they are just superceded at the moment by his uncontrollable hormones.


If it were me, I wouldn't answer any further communications from him. He just doesn't seem to get the message that you're interested in getting to know what's upstairs before you venture in the basement.

Your final reward will be heartaches and tears if you’ve cheated the man in the glass.          &nb

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Tue, 12-08-2009 - 2:44pm

--Sigh--

You know, you have to be really courageous to keep doing OLD. I've got my profile hidden right now...just had to take a break from this kind of thing. I know you're an experienced online dater, so you know to expect this kind of thing (even though you weren't expecting it from THIS guy), but it still just grinds one down, doesn't it?

I'm going to rest up a bit and then take on the freaks again in January.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Tue, 12-08-2009 - 4:36pm

<>

HA! That really made me laugh because I had started thinking the same thing!

I mean, you'd think after the first time that I wasn't playing along he would have gotten the hint!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2009
Tue, 12-08-2009 - 9:40pm

I don’t think his behavior had anything to do with his profile being wrong.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Tue, 12-08-2009 - 10:13pm

Yesterday I sent him a "this is not a cool way to behave around me, and if this is what you were looking for, by all means go for it, but not with me" email.

Haven't heard back since. Not that I am worried about it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2009
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 12:30am

"this is not a cool way to behave around me, and if this is what you were looking for, by all means go for it, but not with me"


I'm hearing Aretha Franklin right now:


"R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me".

Your final reward will be heartaches and tears if you’ve cheated the man in the glass.          &nb

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 11:54am
The ironic part is that these sites do have a category for people who just want casual sex or something like that, so these kind of guys could just save themselves a lot of time by going for that category since there are women who want that as well. so why not try truth in advertising? But I guess he's just totally clueless, not to mention obnoxious.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 7:36pm

He called me last night at about 10:30. Mentioned my "long" (four paragraphs) email. I said, Yep, I said what I needed to say, now I'm done. He maintained a 15 minute conversation that did not once go over the line.

But here is what I think...I think when he was calling me and being gross, he was drunk. Not excusing it, because Lord knows I'm not going there, I did 18 years with one of those. Explains the actions, doesn't excuse it.

Ah, dating on line...always a challenge!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2009
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 8:40pm

You sent him a 4 paragraph email, and left the door open.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Wed, 12-09-2009 - 10:36pm

No, not interested, just weirdly curious as to why people behave the way they do. When people approach you in such a, well, different way, you wonder what is making them tick.

Almost like a weird anthropological study. Makes you want to write a book about how strange people can be when they claim they want a relationship, but then behave like this. What on Earth are they thinking?

So, I am not interested in pursuing this. It's done!

Pages