question: IM

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2006
question: IM
2
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 3:09pm

So... I'm trying to move on a do this online dating thing. I signed up and I get SO many random e-mails. I found one guy that I liked and I sent him a message. I asked some questions and included my e-mail address and the only response I received back was an invitation as an IM friend -- what does that mean? shouldn't the person also send me some sort of e-mail response? Is that weird? Doesn't that sound realtively uninterested in me?

I'm confused...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 4:58pm

No, I wouldn't necessarily take it that he's not interested. But me personally, I HATE IM except in cases where I am at my desk and need to get a quick answer from someone or something. I despise using it as a form of communication. It's as bad as texting and maybe worse. IMO, it should be used as minimally as possible and definitely NOT as a method to get to know someone but it seems to be growing in popularity as a form of communication.

Yes, the polite thing would have been to send you an email response back, but because he didn't isn't to say he's not polite or not a decent person or not interested in you. It just means he likes IM. If you don't, there's no harm in sending an email saying, "I'm not a big fan of IM - I don't think you can really communicate or get to know someone that way. I like to exchange a few emails and then move to the phone."

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 5:16pm
Yes it does seem like that the guy is relatively uninterested and/or just playing around on the site. I have done the same thing only to have gotten an IM request. I usually have deleted those guys and move on. Some think it may not mean he is not interested but in my experience it has definitely always been proven that he wasn't interested or serious about meeting someone.