question for a man, Mark?
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question for a man, Mark?
| Sat, 05-20-2006 - 9:04pm |
I need a man's point of view. Do men prefer to do the calling? I read the book "he's just not that into you" and "the rules of online dating" and I want to know if that's true in all cases. Until it is proven otherwise, I want to protect myself from being hurt by not contacting guys, no matter how hard it is to hold back, and let them contact me. Am I doing the right thing?

Gee.. I hate to represent my entire gender. I am sure I do not. I am sure that I am a different age bracket (I'm 52), cultural background (New Jersey suburban 3rd generation Japanese American),life circumstances (married 19 yrs, divorced 6 yrs, looking for another life partner), yadda yadda yadda.. you get the picture.
It sounds like you answered your own question: "...I want to protect myself from being hurt by not contacting guys..." So it does not really matter what "guys" think or what books say.. you just spoke your own truth in what would work for you for now. Don't you agree?
To answer your question, I would be flattered to be called IF I am attracted to the woman. Otherwise I feel like I am in an awkward position to figure out how to turn her down (gee, sound familiar gals?).
Take care of yourself,
Mark
Hi there,
I am not Mark, but I am a man.
I think your mileage may vary. I don't mind at all if a woman calls me, but many of my friends like to be 'in control'. I suspect that most guys feel the need to be in control of a relationship from the very start, and that is why they like to be the one to call first.
I don't think you are going to find a rule that is true 100%, or I may be the exception that proves the rule. You are probably better off getting a sense from the guy before calling, that feeling of geniune connection before taking the leap.
Good luck! :)
George