? re: IM'ing with Yahoo ... Hope i can

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
? re: IM'ing with Yahoo ... Hope i can
10
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 11:03pm

ask that here. Its not a dating site .... but i assume a lot of you communicate with people that way?


I am new to Yahoo IM. I set it up b/c

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 12:33am

I don't "chat" anymore with guys from OLD sites...I don't know if you've said how old you are, but with guys in my age group (40s), the ones who are into IM either want to have cyber sex or they just want to chat (and never meet). So I don't do it anymore.

But, I do know having done it that him "going idle" while you were on just means that he'd been away from his keyboard for 15 minutes at the moment it switched to idle (or however long he has it set for). It was just a coincidence, in other words.

And yes, your message will show up when he gets back to the computer.

FWIW, the language in your profile could be interpreted that you're just looking for casual sex...is that the case?

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 11:01am

I personally don't like IM as a form of communication for OLD. I'm not sure exactly what bugs me about it, but I guess when it comes down to it, I would prefer to email a few times, get to the phone and get to the meet. I guess IM kind of perpetuates endless online converstaions. Anyway, on to the status.

Generally Idle would mean that he is away from his computer fora period of time and didn't change his status to something saying he was away. You are right that after a certain amount of time, it changes to Idle. However, you CAN create your own status messages on Yahoo. Like for me, I created "In a Meeting" as I have several co-workers on my IM list. I suppose you could create your own one that said "Idle" so that if you were online and didn't want to talk to someone and didn't want to sign off or make yourself Invisible (thus showing the person you WERE online and ignoring them!) that you could put that status up and they would think you were away from the computer. Really sneaky and devious, but it could happen. I prefer to log on Invisible and then if anyone I want to chat with is online, I'll make myself Available.

Anyway, probably not a great sign that you haven't heard back from him, but not a complete yet. If I were you, I would not contact him again. You put the ball back in his court (twice with two email and then again with the IM) so at this point, it is very much his turn so I wouldn't contact him again until he contacts you.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 1:29pm

Thanks for the feedback. & yes, i feel the same way about IM< its almost juvenile or something.


& surpise! I head from him today:


Hey there....

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 1:50pm
That's good! I'm glad you heard back. Now hopefully he'll reschedule too. Good luck!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 7:36pm

LOL, no! Not just looking for casual sex.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 8:26pm

Oh, that seems fine...the way you paraphrased it sounded more "fling-ish" to me.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 9:40pm

Rebecca, I hope you don't take this the wrong way as I'm not trying to hurt your feelings or anything...


But honestly, you sound like a great gal. You sound like you're worrying way too much and reading too much into everything. Remember, this is supposed to be fun! Try not to read so much into it. Go IM, go have fun. Enjoy this. Enjoy the attention. Enjoy the fact that you're utlimately in control!!!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 10:41pm

No offense taken - yeah, i was reading to much into it, Sort of.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 10:42pm
& LUCKILY ... *he* never knew i was obsessing b/c i had YOU guys to obsess too! lol
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 10:55pm
Feel free to obsess here as much as you'd like... :o) I get the sense at some point, you will completely be comfortable with this process and will wind up being an old-timer here! :o)