the remains of OLD...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2005
the remains of OLD...
2
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 10:46am

When you decide to stop or take a break from OLD and you're in the middle of communicating with some guys, what do you do?

This doesn't relate to my previous post about the guy I'd resumed contact with after a month and told I was interested only in friendship. I had recently decided that I wanted to start dating and felt a sense of optimism and excitment about it all, so I reactivated my profiles. And it was fun for a while, getting winks and messages, but it soon felt overwhelming. Not sure why, but I'm returning to therapy today to talk about and process the events of the last month.

Once I started having these negative feelings and I made the decision to return to therapy, I decided once again to remove my profiles. But during those few days that the profiles were back up, I started communicating with two guys. I don't want to ghost or disappear for a month like I had already done. What do you do? I'm open to the possibility of meeting them, and in fact one of them could be promising because he's also an academic who relocated here for work, so like me, signed up hoping to meet people to explore the area with. I'm just not terribly excited or optimistic about dating and relationships AND on top it all, I'm going back to therapy. I feel like a broken set of baggage right now. No man in his right mind would want to get involved with me and that makes me reluctant toward these two guys.

How do I handle this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 10:54am

I would at least meet them and see, it's just two guys and maybe nothing will come of it.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 11:36am

What they don't know won't hurt them. You can still communicate by email in a friendly way, just make it clear that you will be taking a break from meeting new people during the holidays (because you are swamped with parties, family and obligations) and may be able to meet them at a later time.

I'm on break right now but am actively in email communication with a couple of men that I have not met yet.