Responses to Rejection

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2006
Responses to Rejection
12
Wed, 08-09-2006 - 11:12am

This is just a little vent, but I am beginning to understand why some guys just don't answer e-mails/winks when they are not interested. I used to think it was just rude, but maybe they are just afraid of rude replies.

Most of the time when I have sent a polite, "thanks but we're not a match" response, I have gotten no answer. That seems appropriate to me. A few other times I have gotten a "good luck on your search," which also seems appropriate. A couple of guys asked me to reconsider which I replied to politely and that was that. But some guys are just nasty. You can tell they are just hitting out because they are hurt, but it's still unpleasant.

The most recent one wishes me luck with the tag "you are going to need it." Now, I am sure that I am not the only woman who has not been interested in him. He is obese and he hasn't got an interesting profile (not just for picky me--this guy likes to do maybe three things and has nothing to say about himself except that he is a nice laid back guy). So I am guessing that when women just ignore his winks/e-mail he leaves them alone, but when they are polite enough to reply "thanks but no thanks," he answers rudely.

It's a real encouragement not to be polite.

Elsa

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2006
Mon, 08-14-2006 - 9:56pm

Yes, I see that. But I still prefer to get a response. And to me it _is_ rude not to answer someone, so I will probably go on doing it.

I suppose the flip side of this is that those of you who hate getting the "no thanks" message should keep in mind that the person sending it is just trying to be polite and not keep you dangling.

Elsa

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-14-2006 - 10:04pm

Exactly ;-)! I hate getting those responses, but I do try to think of them that way!

Sheri

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