Rude response

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Rude response
8
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 3:57pm
okay, before I took my profile down yesterday I received an email from a guy. He asked if if was snowing where I am. So I responded and asked where his town was (I wasn't familar with it - I'm in MD he was in VA). He wrote back the location. I wrote back saying "to be honest I think we live too far away from each other". Well.....he wrote back "Yes we are.And maybe not a very good match either.I was just chatting.I dont expect everyone i talk too to think i want a date or be a boyfriend.Sorry for the misunderstanding.But bestof luck in your search!*hugsssssss*
I thought that was rude (or was I rude?). Yet another reason why I'm off of there.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: donna710
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 4:09pm

I think his response was more along the lines of "I'm trying desparately to save face because you've rejected me".

The nerve of you thinking he might be interested in *dating* you, when he contacted you through a *dating* website ;-)!!!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
In reply to: donna710
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 4:11pm

If you get a contact through a dating site -- they are looking for a date no matter what they write. People who aren't interested don't write.

I'll guarantee you that if you hadn't told him you were too far that he'd have been emailing you ad nauseum....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: donna710
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 4:47pm
Well, not always 100% of the people. There was a time... in my early stages when I would write to some women about something in their profile and I REALLY DIDN'T have a romantic interest. I quit doing that when I received several responses back either as Let's Meet or Get Lost.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
In reply to: donna710
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 6:46pm
I must admit that I've written once or twice to people with comments about their profile not expecting to talk with them past that initial comment.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2004
In reply to: donna710
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 8:01pm

I don't think you were rude, or him either. I think he was a bit... prickly, let's say, but oh well. But he wasn't really rude- rude would have been calling you a name, or ignoring you from that point or something.

I must confess I have NEVER understood why people say things like that on an OLD site. "I wasn't hitting on you, I was just wanting to chat." In the immortal words of Colonel Sherman T Potter (from the TV show MASH)...

HORSEFEATHERS!

If you're on a freakin OLD site, you're writing to people because of *something* that sparked your interest or made you want to talk to them... and it's a DATING site, not a "hey let's chat about the weather in your town" site.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
In reply to: donna710
Mon, 02-28-2005 - 8:54pm
Well, I disagree just a bit. On one dating site, I have the geographical parameter set fairly wide, so I sometimes see a fellow who seems very interesting but just lives too far away for easy dating. I will send an email, anyhow, just to tell him what a great "profile" he has written, or maybe to get some information (if we share a common hobby, for example). These are friendly gestures, not intended or perceived as anything else. But they only occur about once a month.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
In reply to: donna710
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 7:37pm
miscommunication. but didn't sound "rude" to the pt where either party offended the other or maybe he offended you by assuming you wanted a relationship... I think it happens so much wiht OLD because you start off emailing - and most of the time things get taken way out of context via email.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
In reply to: donna710
Sat, 03-05-2005 - 8:37pm
You simply pointed out the fundamental issue of distance, and he just didn't know how to recover from losing face. how awkward. I'd rather prefer an honest reponse, "I understand distance may be a problem, but still I wanted to say hi to you." or something like that. Some guys simply live for their pride.. hmm..