Seeing someone I know on an OLD site

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Seeing someone I know on an OLD site
10
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 11:10am

There is this guy that I take dancing lessons with who I have seen on 2 OLD sites (POF and match).

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2009
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 1:20pm

I had the same situation once.

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 1:49pm

As hard as it is to do, I think you just need to let this one go. If he were interested, he would have asked you out, even with the risk of being in an ongoing class.

I feel your pain. I have a similar one. The only guy I met through OLD that I really wanted to ask me out never did. He confused me by emailing me about a topic we discussed. I ran into him numerous times at art venues, and we would talk. He even friended me on Facebook (which I think now is the "Friend-Zone" kiss of death). It's not like I feel like we are this perfect match, because we've never dated--but I would like the chance to find out. But after two years it's pretty frickin' unlikely he'll ever feel moved to ask me out. But it kills me too---I even saw him over the weekend at an art thing, and like you, I think, "He's doing OLD, I'm so his "type" and I'm standing right here in front of him."

But for me, part of it is that there is so little opportunity otherwise. I just don't meet many men either through OLD or in my real life. So I probably think too much about him.

On the other hand, there was another guy I met that I liked, but just didn't feel attracted to. He was smart, funny, divorced with no children like me, had a good job, etc....but I just wasn't attracted. Part of it was his beer belly, but even if he lost the weight, I still think it wouldn't be there for me. And believe me, I wanted it to be there, but it wasn't. And I wonder if the other guy thinks that about me--yeah, she's great and all, but I'm just not attracted.

Have you ever read He's Just Not That Into You? I think the author really nails it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 6:36pm

The 2 times I've seen guys on OLD who I knew in real life and contacted them it didn't work out well, even though I didn't ask to date them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 6:38pm

I know you are right, which is why I am venting here & not contacting him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2011
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 8:24pm

How accurate are your pictures? In my experience hanging out with Meetup groups, I've had

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Tue, 09-20-2011 - 9:58pm

My pictures are all recent--there is no way he wouldn't recognize me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2011
Wed, 09-21-2011 - 10:12am
To me, that's also
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 09-21-2011 - 10:24am

Thanks JT for the thought.

Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Wed, 09-21-2011 - 10:38am

Sometimes those play it safe

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 09-21-2011 - 1:40pm

I tend to agree w/ you on this one, FG.