Separated vs. Widowed

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Separated vs. Widowed
22
Sat, 02-12-2005 - 10:50am
I've noticed that almost every man I see online is willing to date someone who is separated but hardly anyone is willing to date someone who is widowed. . This doesn't make sense to me. Has anyone else noticed this?

 

 

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2004
Thu, 02-17-2005 - 2:44am

Welcome. You've come to the right place to prepare for your re-entry into the dating world, and particularly into OLD. :)

I'm curious... you appear to contradict yourself. First you say:

>>I was thinking that when I do, I would not disclose my widowed status.<<

Then you say:

>>If someone is going to discount me because my husband died, then it's his loss.<<

These two things don't seem to jibe.

I think you should state up front that you're widowed, for a couple of reasons. First of all, if you put something other than that on your "status" question, then you're lying- and about something pretty important (ie, whether you're single or not).

If you don't put anything at all (or put "no answer") then that will harm you as well, because lots of people steer clear of any profile that skips answering a pretty major point like that.

Finally, to suggest you're not going to put down that you're widowed, but then later taking the attitude that if a guy doesn't like it it's his problem because you're good with it... well, I think that's a great attitude, but you should have it right from the beginning! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 02-17-2005 - 9:46am
Yes....I have noticed it. It makes me believe that they are not seriously looking if they are willing to date someone who is separated. I do not understand why they will not date someone who is widowed. It makes no sense. Pat

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