She's Moving Him In

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
She's Moving Him In
4
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 10:37am

My gf met a man online who lives 2 hours away. They decided to chat since he was planning on moving to Atlanta once he found employment. He visited last week and they met for the first time. He stopped by briefly at her son's basketball game and chatted for a few and then left. They have not gone on a date, or anything. She did comment to me the prior weekend that when she tries to call him he has his phone off! His response to his phone being off was leave a message and I'll return the call. Apparently she likes him (and has told me that she would like a relationship with him and perfect in so many ways) but at this juncture they both are not in no hurry -- basically going with the flow. She is 43 and he is 40, both have one son (12 yo). Well he recently found employment and she has offered him a place to stay at her apartment. He is coming alone, and moving clothes and weight equipment. Apparently he is selling everything else -- and must have done so if he will be here on Saturday. He was planning to stay with his sister-in-law but decided to stay w/my friend. When she told me last night I didn't say anything, cause this type of friend doesn't seek advice; she does what she wants to do. It really is bothering me but I know she has to live her life.

This friend of mine really extends herself -- loaning money, food, her car, if necessary, moving guys in (yes, she has done it before) and none of these guys can or have ever reciprocated. Most of these guys she has liked and wanted a relationship with them but they don't ever want one with her but they do remain in her life as friends.

Oh well, just wanted to vent and wonder why she behaves this way? I can only hope this guy doesn't bring any drama into her living situation, especially for her son. All I can do is send prayers and hope things work out for her and her son. I'm really concerned about their safety!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 10:50am
I'm concerned for your friend too, that is insane she's met him once briefly and she's letting a complete stranger move in with her and her child.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-1997
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 10:59am

Steph,

ITA with you. It's a huge risk to move this joker in with her either way, but to do this to her child when there are all kinds of child sexual predators hiding and living on the DL, WHAT IS SHE THINKING???

Do you know this guy's name? I highly suggest that if you don't have a membership to an on-line detective service, please join today and check him out! I have a membership to an on-line detective service because I do date on-line and trust when I say, it is definitely a life saver!

Good luck....
~H

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 12:25pm

Sounds to me like the way she thinks others will like her is if she bends over backwards for them. Does she have self-esteem issues?


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Tue, 02-28-2006 - 1:39pm
She would say "no she doesn't" but I beg to differ!