Should I Call

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Should I Call
30
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:31pm
I recently met someone while I was out having dinner - we ended up talking for 7 hours had a great time!! I left him a message when i got home per his request so he would know i made it home safely - I went away for the rest of the weekend - he left me a message later that evening expressing what a good time he had and looks forward to seeing me again and he will talk to me later- (that was Saturday evening) I retuend his call Monday morning letting him know I too had a great time and would like to chat again soon- its now Thursday and I havent heard from him SHOULD I CALL??

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:35pm
I say YES.... simply b/c what's the worst that could happen? If he doesn't call back then you know he wasn't interested... but I would just call one time....
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:37pm

No.The ball is in his court – he needs to return your call. If he’s really into you he will pin you down for another date and if he’s busy (maybe travel this weekend or whatever) he’ll return your call expressing he’s busy and will pick a date for next week to have a second date. If he’s not, chances are your one of a few he’s dating so let him come to you.

SP

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:43pm

I say no, you called him last it's his turn and if he likes you and wants to see you again, he will call.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:45pm
I will add, another reason to not put all eggs in one basket - you should be out there dating too - you wouldn't even think twice whether he has or hasn't returned your call. Remember, the early bird catches the worm and if he doesn't see how great you are and pins down another date right away then it's his chance or risk of loosing you to another male suiter.
 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:56pm
OR DO YOU THINK I SHOULD GO BACK TO THE PLACE I MET HIM TOMORROW NIGHT (HE SAID HE GOES ALL THE TIME)
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 2:57pm

I consulted my book (yes, I have a great book...its "mars and venus on a date") I don't take the book as the bible but on some points its right on. From the chapter about calling or not.......

"when a women pursues a man, automatically he will relax and become more passive about the relationship." It goes on to explain that when you stop pursuing him then usually he will lose interest.

it also points out "How many times have you ended a relationship that the man suddenly becomes interested?"

so the book recommends two options. one--fill up your time with activites and other relationships so you are not sitting by the phone. or two calling-- but keeping to convesation short. my personal rule is if I can't imagine past hello and two sentances then I don't call....oh the games we play.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 3:01pm
OR DO YOU THINK I SHOULD GO BACK TO THE PLACE I MET HIM TOMORROW NIGHT (HE SAID HE GOES ALL THE TIME)

Absolutely not!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 3:03pm
No, no and no. Now your thinking of stalking him so to speak, let it go. Read the other threads, go out and date other men and stop focusing on the one who isn’t asking you out again. If he was interested he’s pin down another date, bottom line. It’s human nature to want what you can’t have. This happens all the time, you go out with a guy, conversation is great, he follows up with a phone call but doesn’t ask you out and then disappears hence date other people until some guy gets and sees the quality of you!
 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 3:13pm

TWO MORE QUESTIONS-

1) SINCE HE CALLED THE NEXT NIGHT AND I DIDNT RETURN THAT CALL FOR TWO DAYS DO YOU THINK THAT TURNED HIM OFF

2) SHOULD I GO BACK TO THE PLACE I MET HIM TOMORROW NIGHT (HE GOES THERE ALOT) I WAS INVITED TO GO THERE TO MEET SOME OTHER PEOPLE BUT I DONT WANT TO SEEM LIKE A STALKER

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2005
In reply to: mikylyn
Thu, 09-15-2005 - 3:26pm

I agree with everyone else....I have the same problem of I want to call and call and text and call......two things I do...one I delete his phone number from everywhere.I have gone as far as repograming my cell with a girlfiends number under the guys name.

then two, I find some activities and fill my time. for example, I do pi-yo or yoga 2 nights a week. (it gets me out of the apartment and it helps me to relax) I have taken a pottery class at our local park/rec office (8 weeks for 65.00)(again it gets me out of the apartment and gives me a chance to meet friends) I have taken a mosaic tile class through park/rec (6 weeks 45.00) I am currently taking Knitting. You get the idea...If you look there should be some fun and cheap things to do within your area. And I also think that sooner or later I will stumble upon aomething that I really love and am passionate about....

I know no one in my area to go and do things with so therefore I make my own "social schedule" that has nothing to do with men (unless there happens to be a cute one in a class). I find things that I don't mind doing solo....and there are always plenty of other solo people at the activities.

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