shouldn't have asked him
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shouldn't have asked him
| Mon, 09-12-2005 - 7:11pm |
I asked a guy by email if he wanted to go out this weekend on my birthday. We'd met in person from an online dating site already. He got back to me saying that he'll email me if he's free on the weekend and that he'll at least wish me a happy birthday. Then stupidly, I emailed him back saying that he seems like the type that makes plans at the last minute and how I do that sometimes too. I ended it saying that maybe I'll see him later with a question mark. Now when I think about it, he didn't really want to see me, that was just his way of being nice about it, which I don't like. He should've said he already had plans or something like that. Now I feel like an idiot sending him that last email. He'll be laughing at me now:-(

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So? You barely know the guy. Who cares if he is "laughing" at you? I'm sure he's not (maybe just rolling his eyes ;-)), but even if he is, what's the big deal? You need to learn to let this stuff roll off your back...you'll drive yourself crazy otherwise.
You can't control what other people do or "should" do. All you can control are YOUR actions and YOUR reactions to their actions.
Sheri
If he's into you, he won't care that you sent that email, and if he's not, it won't matter, because he's already not into you. So don't sweat it!
Sheri
Just take it as a learning experience.
I am sure he has not put anymore thought into it.
CL-Truewild1969
For further information regarding OLD including FAQ please visit our OLD Website at;
Edited 9/13/2005 5:48 pm ET ET by kathy748
I was just about to say something similar, gretchen! Kathy, stop overanalyzing everything! And stop with the emails and the insecurities! The more you keep emailing him these little messages about "oh, I guess you just don't like me", the less he is going to like you! Guys don't like clingy girls or ones that freak out like this when they hardly know you.
You have no idea why he is logging out of messenger when you sign on. Sure, maybe it is to avoid you but maybe he just is. He sure is going to do so now because I bet he doesn't want to deal with the drama.
Take all this as a learning experience and just try to go with the flow a lot more. You need a very thick skin and a lot of patience to do OLD. A lot of times you will not get the answers you want or the guy you want. But if you are relaxed about it, it won't bother you so much. Besides, what do you care if he "likes" you or not? He is a guy you met once. Don't worry so much about what he thinks (or anyone else for that matter) and you'll be much happier!
Thanks for making me realize this. I'm really too inexperienced with the whole dating thing. I have to stop all of this now. I emailed him again to apologize. I know, stop emailing, but I wanted to say I was sorry.I'm not really into him either. He's just there so that's why I've been contacting him and asked him out. He's not the type of guy I'd go for. So that's that anyway.
Edited 9/13/2005 7:37 pm ET ET by kathy748
Edited 9/13/2005 7:37 pm ET ET by kathy748
Kathy, I agree with everything Vex said and would also add, remove him from your IM list. That way you won't know if he's online...outta sight, outta mind. It will make it much easier for you to move on and you won't worry about whether he's logging off because you are there, because you won't see him log off. JMHO
Libra
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