shouldn't have asked him
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shouldn't have asked him
| Mon, 09-12-2005 - 7:11pm |
I asked a guy by email if he wanted to go out this weekend on my birthday. We'd met in person from an online dating site already. He got back to me saying that he'll email me if he's free on the weekend and that he'll at least wish me a happy birthday. Then stupidly, I emailed him back saying that he seems like the type that makes plans at the last minute and how I do that sometimes too. I ended it saying that maybe I'll see him later with a question mark. Now when I think about it, he didn't really want to see me, that was just his way of being nice about it, which I don't like. He should've said he already had plans or something like that. Now I feel like an idiot sending him that last email. He'll be laughing at me now:-(

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Kathy, stop beating yourself up over this. He obviously isn't worth it. Which leads me to my next question because you really have me dumbfounded here! Why in the heck if you knew he's involved in drugs (which you want to stay as far away from as possible!) AND is always broke- WHY would you want to go out with him in the first place much less continue to pursue him after you met and decided that you probably wouldn't get along??? I understand the feeling of not getting a lot of hits so you think you should pursue what you have (if this is what you're doing) but if someone doesn't meet your basic standards and has red flags in their profile such as drugs and money problems - take 30 seconds to think to yourself, "Is this person worth my time to respond? Do I think we'll get along due to our differences in values? Is there ANY long-term potential due to these glaring red-flags or am I hoping that he'll change for me once we meet?" I'm confused as to why you would pursue a guy that has such problems and that you're not interested in anyway.
But again, back to the self-esteem issues. Work on yourself first so you don't settle for some schmuck that you don't have anything in common with and violates your ethics or deal-breakers but happened to contact you.
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