sleepover on a first meet?
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| Sun, 07-31-2005 - 11:59am |
I was talking to a guy online that lives about 2 hours away. I've emailed him a few times and chatted twice with him on msn. There was a concert happening last night that I told him I was going to. He mentioned that he'd like to see it too so I, jokingly, asked him how long it would take him to get here. He asked me if I wanted him to come here and I said if he wanted to, so we were trying to figure out where he could stay overnight. He suggested sleeping on my couch but since I board with my parents, I knew they wouldn't go for that so I told him that. So, it turned out, he couldn't come afterall.
My question is, would any of you let a guy you've only met once, sleep on your couch for the night? Maybe when you get to know him more that night, you could trust him, do you think?

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No. No way, no how.
And the idea that you can figure out that you can trust someone after spending a couple hours with them...not a smart one.
Sheri
I hate pushy guys! Everything he has said screams "let's jump into bed". This is not a test, this is not a drill, it's perfectly clear. Just say no and find someone else.
IMHO -- only teenagers test girls to see what kind of girl they are. Adults don't think that way. Well, the adult ones anyway.
amjay
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No, no, no, no, no. Never, never, never, never, never.
Clear?
Edited 7/31/2005 1:34 pm ET ET by dream_angel2005
I'm sorry, it's just so clear to me that maybe I'm not using the right words.
To include a sleepover at first meeting is like going to the mall, meeting a "nice" guy and then taking him home with you. I certainly wouldn't feel safe doing that.
An important issue with OLD is personal safety. It is imperative that we are careful about who we allow into our lives. It is a huge mistake to think that nothing bad could happen to us!
Protecting ourselves means always remembering that the people we contact are complete strangers, and not letting what they say about themselves affect our judgment. The proof of a person's true worth comes with time and observation.
amjay
errr..well..to show the other side of it but not condone it..
i was in bed within 30 minutes of meeting my last OLD date...now I suppose i am a slut and a booty call to him. (After much protesting on the phone the week before about meeting out...it was hot and we are both smokers...asked him over to my place knowing full well that he a) has done this...meet at others' homes b) knowing I'd probably end up fooling around if both attracted ...didnt really count on the whole enchilada...but he's been over a couple of more times...yup...sex. I know full well that this won't be a heartened "romance" ...but damn he is hot AND sweet (didnt expect how sweet) LOL and I am pretty conservative on the outside and lusty on the inside. This isnt the first time this has happened to me. I guess i'll slide him into the bootycall category until i can get a man ...that is local..that is single..that is wanting a real relationship. This guy claims to want to get to know me. I kinda know better that it will probably never happen. I have ZERO expectations of it. As soon as i tire from the awesome sex or find someone else to conduct myself in a more enriching way...i'll do this ..but its my choice and i am not trying to turn back the clock...that will totally have to be up to him.
In other words...i am realistic (but with a silly grin on my face lol and something to think about at work). I lucked out ...he is just a 40-something man with a busy life who happens to be very tactile. He calls and texts me everyday...way more attention then anyone ever in a lonnnng time. He does this knowing we are probably not going to see each other until the weekend (he lives an hour away).
I guess i need the "flattery" right now after what ive been through...so far its not hurting anyone and i am sure he is not married. (99.9%).
Don't press your luck like me. I put him through the ringer before this. I still 'LUCKED" out that he is not a criminial or psycho...but I am sure to mention my friend who is a detective early on in my conversations. lol..
I wrote this because i wanted to be honest that this situation happens but to not look to it as a romance coming from it.
Lizzie
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