So tired of men's online games

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
So tired of men's online games
9
Sun, 11-27-2005 - 12:13pm

I winked at a guy last weekend, and the next day, he winked back. I e-mailed him my real e-mail addy, thinking that since he only winked back, and didn't e-mail, that he might not be a paying member. Two days later, he sends me this e-mail through Match (so he was a member afterall):

"Hey i just wanted to let you know that i got your e-mail. since it's been a day or so i thought i would drop you a line to let you know im kind of busy this week, im tring to move before it gets real cold out. Incase you thought you lost my interest or something. So when i get some time, when its not working on midnight I will sit down, and let you know about me. I really do look forward to chatting with you. Thanks Matt"

OK, cool, that was nice of him. It was Wednesday by this time, so I thought the whole Thanksgiving thing would put a crimp in it, too, so I e-mailed him back and said that it was no problem, that I really liked his profile, and that I'd be around when he got settled in, just to e-mail me when he got the chance.

So Thanksgiving came and went, and now it's Sunday, and I haven't heard from him yet...and I've caught him showing Online Now! a couple times that I've been on Match.

So why bother winking back and sending that nice e-mail if he had no intentions of actually e-mailing me? (This was the really cure guy that I posted that I thought he was way too cute for me and that nothing would ever work out--hmmm, didn't need hindsight on that one, huh?)

And a similar thing happened with another guy that I winked at on the same day. He winked back, I gave him my real addy, the next day he e-mailed my Yahoo account, I e-mailed him back, he hid his profile, the next day he e-mailed me again (after he hid his profile), so I e-mailed him back, and that's been 2 days ago and I haven't heard anything since.

GRRR!!! It's all nothing but games...I don't know why I even bother...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
Sun, 11-27-2005 - 12:23pm

Hey, I just discovered Bikram Yoga this weekend - I almost walked out of the class it was so hard with the 100+ degree heat but sucked it up and did the moves when I could. I'm athletic, run, hike etc., but yoga is by far the most challenging athletic I've done to date and it's great for the mind, spirit & washing away all those toxins from on line dating, LOL.

OK back to your topic - yes I've had the same thing, I have given my number out this past month to a few guys who are like 'great, I'll call you tonight' then a week goes by, they write 'do you still want to talk' and I say yes, the ball is in your court you have my number then disapear.

OK, fact, these guys are dating just like you are. So my advice is yes quality vs quantity however meet or correspond with a few, it is a NUMBERS game. However, the good news is "it only takes ONE" yes ONE and you will find him but just now right away more than likely.

So, no expecations with any of these guys seriously. Pretend they are just fans of yours trying to get a date and they'd be lucky to meet you out and the right guy will move mountains to be with you. Even after you meet a great guy out and have a fabulous date or two anything could happen, yes he could disapear so again enjoy the journey and keep the faith that one day sooner rather than later you will connect with someone mutually. If you're guessing or analzying he's NOT your guy, early stages will be effortless that much I do know.

So laugh and think, poor guy, he missed out on a great gal oh well NEXT and bring um on!!!

Ms. Peanut

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sun, 11-27-2005 - 2:41pm

It might not be games.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-27-2005
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 10:25am

In my experience, when a guy says he will write more later, 90% of the time that is the last time you hear from him. I can't explain it to you - I don't know who these people are and I never encountered them prior to OLD. Weird.

It helps if you take things more lightly early on with OLD - less aggravation for you. Sending a shamrock your way!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 3:23pm

Same thing has happened to me numerous times.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 3:31pm
All you need to find is one decent man.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 3:35pm

Definitely.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 3:44pm
One decent man that you are attracted to and have at least a small amount of chemistry with and want to see again. Plenty of decent ones out there that just are not right for you.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2001
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 3:55pm
I got a "Happy Thanksgiving" instant message the other day from a guy I chatted with daily for nearly 2 weeks. Same guy I talked to on the phone twice (he called me once & I called him once) who later just wasn't online at all. Then when he finally was, we had a long chat where I asked him about us ever meeting. He replied that he "froze up" on meeting people for the first time. I should have asked him why he ever had a profile on any dating site if that were the case. He had no intention of ever meeting apparently. Anyway, I hadn't removed him from my messenger list (although I think I will now). I just thought it was odd that he should care anything about my "Thanksgiving" since I hadn't talked to him in weeks. So, yes, the games get extremely old with OLD.
Avatar for travkitty
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2003
Mon, 11-28-2005 - 7:56pm

Just takes one decent man....true.

However, what if that one decent man STILL isn't the right one for you? LOL!

My latest ex was a wonderful man, still a wonderful friend. We just didn't work compatibility wise enough to get married. My parents still mourn his loss, though. LOL! It's funny how they still ask me about him.