strange ones

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2004
strange ones
4
Thu, 10-27-2005 - 11:04pm
O.k., I finally have some slightly weird OLD "experiences" to share. I got to the open communication stage with this guy on eHarmony. First e-mail, general chit chat and then gives me his number. I respond and ask about why he doesn't ahve aphote. I ask since he can see mine do I get so see his (PHOTOS everybody :) ) No response from him and he moved through the previous stages quickly. Last night I got the closed ended questions (first stage for anyone not familiar with eharmony) from a guy. I answered him. Tonight he closes me saying he's pursing another relationship. I wasn't really that interested anyway, but how do you send someone questions one night and the next be pursuing another relationship? Weird.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
In reply to: momma215
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 5:49pm

Why are those weird? Sound like typical OLD stories (esp from eHarmony) to me! :-) First, there are many people that don't have photos and gloss over that or ignore your requests for them. He might ghost on you completely here. If he does email back and doesn't send any photos, I would politely ask once more and if he doesn't provide any, put him on hold until he does or even close communication. It's only fair that you share photos.

As for the second case, he may have been doing some blanket closing on eH. I know I use the generic reason "I want to pursue other matches..." or whatever. He might have gone out once or twice with someone and decided that he was going to close communication with other people. Or maybe it is his generic excuse that he uses. At least he didn't use the stupid "I don't feel any chemistry" when he hasn't even met you or the hurtful "Based on statements in their profile, I am not interested in pursuing this match."

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2004
In reply to: momma215
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 8:37pm
They were just weird for me. I hadn't experienced any of it on eHarmony. Today I received 5 e-mails from eHarmony that the "no photo" guy had sent me mail, but there wasn't any. As for the other guy. I just foundit weird because why send me questions at all? I mean you send questions on one day and the very next day say you're pursung another relationship? Just don't send the questions at all. I wasn't disappointed, just thought it made no sense.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: momma215
Sat, 10-29-2005 - 5:11am

Probably has something to do with the same reason he doesn't have a photo, I would say. I hate to sound shallow, but he probably isn't very attractive or doesn't feel very attractive. I find that if I ask a man for his pic and he doesn't send it, I don't hear from him again. I myself hated to post my pic, though it is now posted. I hated my pics. But I feel better now that I have lost weight.

Sara




Edited 10/29/2005 5:14 am ET by saralm
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
In reply to: momma215
Sun, 10-30-2005 - 9:23pm
You may not have experienced it before, but let me tell you it is very typical. On eH I got to where I was talking on the phone with a guy - we spent over an hour on the phone one night and things seemed great. We discussed our interests, dreams, everything and also planned on meeting when I got back from a long weekend trip. I emailed him when I got back as he'd asked me to do... no response. I called him and left a message... no call back. All I got was he closed me through eH saying he was "pursuing another relationship". I was gone 3 days so that seemed fishy to me. So in this crazy world of OLD, that happens a lot. Sure, it makes no sense but that's the way it goes!

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo