Sweetie, Honey, Sweet Pea, Baby

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Sweetie, Honey, Sweet Pea, Baby
8
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 2:57pm

Okay is it me? Do any of you feel annoyed or bothered by a man who everytime he calls you (and you have not met yet) he calls you "sweetie, or "honey" or the other names I reference in my discussion title?

How do you tell him to STOP calling you those names?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 3:09pm

Yes, it annoys me, too. Dude - you don't know me well enough to give me a pet name.

Depending on my mood, I'll say "my name is D---, not Cutie, sweetie or whatever. Can we remember that?"

Or I'll get sickening sweet and call him sugertatums or snookyface or some really outrageous name along those lines. They usually get the hint.

If I'm not bent out of shape about it, I'll just say, look, I'd really prefer to avoid the cutesy talk until we have something to base pet names on.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 3:17pm

It is MOST defninitely not just you. I find that extremely annoying and off-putting. I'm thinking - you don't know me! I have even stopped talking to guys for primarily that reason. Usually there was something else that made me uncomfortable (usually other familiarities too soon) but it was a big factor.

I think maybe you just say something like - "Hey, I'm not really comfortable with the cute names (or whatever you want to call them) until I get to know someone better." But ugh, yeah, I don't quite know what to do on that one!

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 3:25pm

Yes, this really annoys me. I had one guy call me "darlin'" incessantly, and it was all I could do to not smack him.

Pet names are best saved for a long-term relationship. Until then, he should learn your name.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 4:21pm
Oh I'm cracking up, I'm going to become sickening sweet! The next time he calls and says, Hello Sweetie, I'm going to say "Hi Snookyface!" My luck, he will probably say, "ooh, I like it when you call me that name!" Ugh!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 5:45pm
My personal favorite is Sugartatums!

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2006
Fri, 02-24-2006 - 12:51am

you say could you call me.."......", i prefer it over sweetie, honey, sweet pea, baby or whatever he has been calling you....

men think it is endearing to say these names....some dont know what to call you so they call you what ever is simple...ie...baby, sweetie etc.... just be straight..no confrontation....but give them something to call you that you like...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2003
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 3:59pm

It's not appropriate to use those endearments with someone you hardly know, and it takes a long time to get to know anyone.

A guy, or gal, who talks that way too soon is showing they lack of sincerity.

You have every right to let the guy know you don't feel comfortable with those terms so early in the game, but you will probably just come off sounding bitchy (a lot of men, and women too, can't take any form of criticism, no matter how gently it is delivered).

With online dating, except for a photo (if furnished), it is worse than a blind date. At least with a blind date, the person who set is up knows both parties and can give some insight before the two of you meet. Online dating is a crapshoot.

And please remember, never give out your phone number, address or place of employment until you have meet on numerous occasions and feel very comfortable that he is not a real nutcase, or worse.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 6:09pm
Yes, it's annoying and no, it's not appropriate, but I've called a lot of men on it, and not one of them understands. Doesn't seem like a difficult concept to me.