Tell me what you think....Warning/Long

Hi everyone! You all seem like a nice group of people so I thought I might jump right in here. I really need some objective input on my situation. Ok, here goes...About a year or so ago I started this online relationship with this woman. I should tell you that I am a woman also. Anyway, things went really well at first, she was very romantic, spent a lot of time chatting and talking on the phone with me, sending a lot of e-cards, etc. This went on for a few months but gradually they became fewer and fewer and the time spent talking has decreased also. We both have family obligations of course that take away from our "online time". I understand that completely. Since we live really far away from each other we've decided the best thing for now is to stay in our current family situations. I'm ok with that decision. My problem is sometimes I wonder if she still cares for me as deeply as she says she does? Or am I just paranoid and insecure? She says it's too hard for her to put into words anymore how she feels and it's just easier for her if we concentrate more on general topics. I do agree with that. It certainly is easier if we don't constantly talk about how much we would like to be together, etc. I guess I just need to hear it sometimes ya know? I didn't think I was such a needy person but it aggravates me how "in control" she can be at times while I'm a basket case. Although I'm really glad she is my rock and I feel I can lean on her. She says she's having just as hard a time as I am but just doesn't show it the same way. I don't know. I believe her but I just can't get rid of these feelings I have. What do you all think and how do you deal with relationships like this? I don't think it would be much different whether it's a same sex or opposite sex relationship. Well, thanks for reading.