Update on my continuing OLD adventures

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Update on my continuing OLD adventures
36
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 11:55am

So, it appears the Rescheduler has disappeared again...I'm more annoyed than anything else, since we went out a bunch of times and I feel like he "should" have told me that he didn't want to see me any more rather than just disappearing. But you can't make people do the right thing, so oh well, I'm trying to just let it go.

Anyway, I put up another CL ad about a week ago and have been fielding a bunch of responses. Because of all the ice on the roads here I didn't end up meeting anyone until yesterday...originally I had meets scheduled for Tues and Wed but the Tues one got rescheduled because of the weather. So I ended up having two meets yesterday and both were really good.

The first was actually with a guy who answered my CL ad back in Sept but he was living in another city and planning to move back here soon. At my suggestion, we emailed once a week or so just to keep in touch while he was firming up his plans. Anyway, he's now here and we had just a great meet. He even brought me presents, LOL, including a CD he'd made for me! They were intended as a thank you for being so patient (his move was delayed a couple times). We really seemed to hit it off and had a great time talking...and we have 2 more dates scheduled (we're going to a sports bar to watch the Pats/Colts game on Sunday and then I invited him to a concert I have tickets for on Monday--normally I wouldn't see someone new 2 nights in a row but I thought he'd really enjoy this concert so I figured what the heck). He even called me right after I got home to say how much he'd enjoyed meeting me and that he couldn't wait to see me again. Now that's how a guy who's interested behaves ;-)! It could be overwhelming but it's not--he seems really grounded, just enthusiastic about me. Anyway, we'll see what happens of course, but it's nice to feel excited about someone new.

The 2nd guy was quite nice also. I didn't feel quite the instant connection I did with the first guy but I definitely felt enough of a connection that I want to see him again. He's going away this weekend but asked me out again for either Sun or Mon, and I had to turn him down. But we're going to talk when he gets back and plan another date.

So now I'm trying to decide if I even want to meet any of the other guys--there are a few others who I was planning to meet but now I don't really feel I want to bother--none of them seem as good on paper, if you will, as the two guys I met yesterday. But I know from experience that things may not work out with either of these guys so I should probably meet the others.

Sheri

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Registered: 07-21-2004
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 12:32pm

Good for you!

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Registered: 10-17-2002
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 2:27pm

Well, it sounds like good riddance to the Rescheduler! I agree that saying it straight up that he wasn't interested in seeing you would be much better, but you know how men can be sometimes. I think they think we will get all crazy and weepy and try to convince them to stay. Sometimes I think they think far too highly of themselves. ;-)

Good luck with the first guy. It sounds like it has promise. And you are one of the biggest proponents for not putting all your eggs in one basket, but hey - there's nothing wrong with being "busy" until sometime next week is there? Oh say until after Monday? You can say that your weekend is busy and next week is a little unpredictable but that you can talk next week and MAYBE firm up some plans? That way, you can see how dates #2 and #3 go with this one guy before blowing off these other guys while still keeping them on the back burner so to speak. Yes, it's too early to focus your attention all on this one guy no matter how aweseome he is but it's not too early to play a wee bit of "wait and see" until after another date or two.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 2:46pm

ITA about the Rescheduler! I'm almost hoping he calls me now so I can blow him off, LOL!

Actually, I think both guys from yesterday have promise, even though I felt the stronger initial connection with the first guy. The guy from last night called me just a little while ago to say how much he enjoyed meeting me, etc. so both guys are definitely racking up some points ;-).

I decided to email 3 of the guys I'd been emailing or talking on the phone with and let them know I'd met someone and had changed my mind about meeting (which I have, it's just more than one someone, LOL). There was something in each guy's case that I wasn't totally jazzed about so I'm fine with not meeting them. So that leaves 2 others--one I'm going to go ahead and have coffee with tomorrow as we'd planned (assuming of course that he calls to follow up), and the other I did exactly what you'd suggested but before I saw your post, LOL. So I may or may not follow up with him next week.

A funny CL story as a side note--you'll appreciate this ;-). I had met 2 guys right before the holidays and was having trouble scheduling a 2nd date with either of them. One guy ended up ghosting on me after canceling our scheduled 2nd date last week (which I'm ok with--I wasn't all that excited about him) and the other guy sent me an email last week saying he thought I was really cool, but had decided he had too much going on in his life right now to date, blah, blah, blah. I said, ok, I understand, get in touch if things calm down for you. Well, a few days later, he answered my new ad, LOL. So of course I had to wirte back and give him a hard time about that...it was funny to hear him backpeddle in his email back to me. I'm more amused than anything else, but it just goes to show you...if you're going to continue to answer ads, you need to be more truthful about why you don't want to continue with someone, rather than give an excuse.

Sheri

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Registered: 10-17-2002
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 3:31pm

That's a good compromise with getting rid of 3 guys you're not really feeling it with but keeping two others around. LOL - great minds on the "being busy" thing! :-)

Yes, I can appreciate that whole scenario. The thing was, I was and even still am really busy. But if I were into a guy, I'd make time for him. The thing about the guy that I told my semi-truth to was that we had been talking since T-giving and he hadn't mentioned getting together. I wasn't into him enough to mention it and he kept sending the daily texts which I'd never answer. By Christmas, I knew I wasn't interested and had been trying to ghost but he wouldn't go away so I told the half-truth. But unfortunately it backfired (a lot like this guy that re-emailed you!). Lesson learned, that's for sure.

I'm torn about trying again soon on CL. I had a lot of responses last time but only met one guy who turned out to look NOTHING like his pic. The others ghosted or I ghosted. I have a date tomorrow with the brother of a casual friend. We tried for last week but we had nasty weather in Dallas too so it got postponed to this week. Even though it may be nasty again tomorrow, it won't be until later and it's just dinner so... we'll see. I need to get out of the funk I've been in lately. 2007 has NOT been a very good year so far and I am starting to get really down.

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Registered: 09-27-2004
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 6:36pm
I wish you luck with these 2 possible suitors :-) It sounds promising so far.....
I think you made the best decision not to see the other guys because at least for me, the more guys I went on dates with at one time, the more confused I got and the less time I had for myself. It's best to narrow it down to a couple and then focus on those 2 or one. But I think having 2 that you are dating in the beginning stages is a good thing because then you aren't too focused on one person if it's still in the casual stages. Keep us posted.
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Registered: 04-29-2003
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 7:49pm

I agree, focus on the two and if the guy you really connect with continues on the next few dates you’ll KNOW if he’s someone you’ll be DATING and then I say why not see what develops?

Avatar Image"The Small Peanu
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Registered: 05-10-2005
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 8:04pm

I am really happy that you have some good guys to be excited about - that's a good feeling, and IMO makes the sometimes tiring dating process worthwhile. At the very least, it sounds like you will have fun getting to know them.

Seems like the right thing to focus on the two most promising ones.

Please keep us posted!

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Registered: 05-06-2006
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 8:35pm

Hi Sheri,

That's great that you've met two nice guys who are possibles. Good luck with it! Is there some way you could delay meeting some of the others since you are obviously not in the mood right now?

Elsa

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Registered: 03-15-2004
Fri, 01-19-2007 - 4:13am
Feast of Famine! lol

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Registered: 02-10-2004
Fri, 01-19-2007 - 9:07am

Hey Sheri,

Glad you've got some new prospects who are showing appropriate levels of interest! Good for you!

A little update of my own.. TDA (the disappearing act, lol!) has indeed resurfaced and we've had a couple of dates since I got back from holiday with another scheduled for this weekend. Definitely lots of fun and lively conversation.. I like him a lot and find him very intellectually and physically attractive, but I remain somewhat guarded for the moment.. Time will tell I guess!

Coolas

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