that was fun, we should do this again
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| Thu, 11-02-2006 - 10:28am |
Do you see anything wrong with saying this at the end of a date? I think the next time i have a good date and i want to see the guy again, i might say this if nothing has been said of future plans. I feel like as women, we are often trained to let the guy do everything first in terms of showing interest, asking out etc. I hate that feeling of when you are on a great date, you leave and nothing is said of any future plans. You wonder, will i see this person again and wait and wonder all week if theyll call or email. Perhaps neither of you wants to go out again, fine...but if you do, I think it should be said right then and there. That way there isnt as much stress of waiting and/or wondering. Of course you could say, we should do this again and the guy could lie and said, yes we should when he doesnt mean it. But at least you know that you've said it, shown some interest and if he doesnt call...you know it's not becuase you didnt show interest
I dunno...i think this is harmless thing to say and it could really ease pressure if two people are into each other. It also shows confidence.

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i also agree that if a guy is truly interested he'll ask you out. I guess that's why i think there's nothing wrong with expressing you had a good time and would be interested in doing it again.
Plus, a lot of these online guys date a lot of women. The dates become pretty meaningless i'd imagine...so even if he is interested in someone, i think a lot of guys get to a point where if the woman doesnt show much interest they have plenty of others to fall back on. It's like a job interview...you need to express some sort of interest at the end, otherwise you often dont get a call back...especially if there are lots of other applicants.
I agree...that's why I do express interest.
Without reading all the other replies, the first thing I thought about was how many times a guy has said this at the end of a first date...only to NEVER call me again. To me, it means that that is a graceful way to end the date without any kind of future date commitments.
The one guy who stands out in my mind the most was not from OLD but a local guy my Mom sort of set me up with. I cooked dinner for him and we had a wonderful evening of conversation, laughter and overall a good time. I sort of knew him before, so it was not really a first-time meet but it WAS what I'd call a first-time date. I don't normally cook for a guy on the first date, but this was not your "norm" as far as dates go. I have written about this guy before, and to this day, I still have scars from how this one turned out.
He had mentioned leaving around 10 pm but stayed almost another hour and talked. I "thought" the evening was going rather well, but around 11 pm he said he really needed to be going and said "this was fun and we should do this again sometime". He got up and shot out the door quicker than I could say anything. There was no "call you sometime" or "maybe we can do lunch or dinner"...NOTHING! It was like the only reason the guy came over was for a free dinner! In some ways, it reminded me of an old Sat. Night Live skit where one of the female characters was left standing at the door when her "date" acted quite bizarre. I could not believe how juvenile this guy turned out to be. Did he think I was going to wrestle him to the ground for a kiss? Anyhow, I guess we live and learn, but that is definitely one date that I would not have bothered to have gone through with if I had known there would be no future dates with the guy. I knocked myself out cleaning like a mad woman for this guy and never heard from him again. Those words "we'll have to do this again sometime" meant that he had no such intention of spending time with me again and did not know what else to say. It was a very bad experience for me.
I only hope when other men say it to women that they truly mean it and WILL set up a time later. My experience has been if the guy did not set up a 2nd date on the 1st, then there was no 2nd date. End of story.
'that is definitely one date that I would not have bothered to have gone through with if I had known there would be no future dates with the guy.'
I have to say that if i knew there would be no future with someone i wouldnt bother to go on a first date with them. First dates can be fun...but they usually arent...especially when that's all it ends up being-a first date
I guess i was trying to positive for once with this thread, lol. But i see there is no easy way to treat a first date. It's funny because i have gone on first dates where i could just tell there would be second, third, 4th, etc...but i just cant believe that in the past 2 months, i've had soo many first dates and only like 1 of them resulted in a 2nd...it was mainly me that didnt want the 2nd dates...but those are some bad odds there.
I seem to have bad "odds" both in real life and OLD. I have only recently unhidden my profile on yahoo, but I am not a paying member so I cannot respond to anyone. I have only gotten 2 messages and neither have photos and also have some "worrisome" traits that seem like we would not work out. One guy put on his profile for "want kids" YES. I have put a big NO on the "want kids" section. You'd think that would be one of the first things people would look at when looking at profiles (at least it is for me anyway). He also put that he was "very conservative" on his political affiliations. I am a semi-liberal Democrat (although conservative on "some" issues) but would think that a right-wing Republican would not be a very good match for me.
One other guy is the farmer from Iowa who is an hour away. So far, NO ONE has responded that has made me even want to renew my subscription. I realize my ego is still somewhat bruised from my last relationship and to this day, I have had no message or phone call from him. I am past wanting him back, but it would do my heart good to know that he realized how badly he screwed up with things with he and I.
I continue to believe the other local guy (one who I used to see and talk to at the restaurant) is in hiding. I was very interested in him, he lived locally, divorced, no kids, so many things in common, and then I hear nothing from him and have not seen him again in several weeks.
I'm having a long conversation with my psychic friend tonight. I always feel so much better after I talk to him. He's sort of like a "therapist" for me. However, his predictions have been lacking here lately. :0
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