Was I being ridiculous?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2006
Was I being ridiculous?
10
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 10:31pm

So I started chatting online with this guy on the dating site. I'm in Canada, and hes in the States. I told him stuff about myself. He asked questions and I answered them, some with great detail.

I asked him a couple of questions, as well as for him to tell me about himself. He somehow is able to evade answering the questions.

Then he tells me I'm the kind of girl he'd like to meet and how would we go around it with the distance. I answered that I would love to meet him but I need to know about him first.

He doesn't again provide me any info about himself but goes on about how you can't really know the person from a keyboard, and that even my photo could be fake.

I was really ticked off and replied back to him rather bluntly - that hes been avoiding answering my questions while I have told him details about me. I also shot back that his pictures could be fake, and that why does he expect me to trust that he is real, and that I have to prove that I'm not fake. I told him he probably also expects me to fly down to the States to meet him without knowing anything about him. I told him his personality is shining through.

He in turn replied that I get angry easily and that he can't afford to be scammed.

Now wouldn't you be ticked??

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 1:03am

I would have said "next!" a few emails ago, I think. I don't think a guy like that is sincere about meeting anyone and therefore not worth getting upset over.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2006
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 10:03am
Sounds like a typical manipulator. You did right to refuse to play the game his way.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 10:12am

I wouldn't share anything else with him until he

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2006
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 11:06am
Yeah, I've already nexted him. I think he was just trying to go by on his looks and its too bad cus he was very goodlooking.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 11:07am
While flat out accusing him of hiding something doesn't seem necessary, yes, you have right to be ticked off. I once had a guy who refused to send me pictures because he said he once had a friend who sent pictures to some woman who put them all over porn sites on the Internet. I told him that I was sorry that happened to his friend, but that I wasn't her and that I refused to meet anyone without a picture so we were at an impasse. I told him good luck and sent him on his way. If he refuses to provide information despite your repeated attempts to get it, tell him thanks but no thanks as you have the right to be safe and "not get scammed" too.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2006
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 11:12am
I wasn't accusing him of hiding anything. He was accusing me of possibly being a scammer while I had told him stuff about myself and I still didn't know anything about him except what he looked like. It makes me feel sort've exposed.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 12:41pm

<>

Umm, shooting back that his pictures could be fake and asking him why he expects you to think he is real is not accusing him of lying? ;-) Sounds like you are accusing him of at least POTENTIALLY lying to me. Regardless, nexting him is a good idea. Any time they hide information - they've got a reason to be hiding.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2006
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 1:03pm

No. The reason I shot that back at him was because he accused my picture of being fake and that I may be fake and trying to scam him.

The only thing I was accusing him of was the inbalance of sharing of information. I shared stuff about me while he did not. He felt that I should automatically believe he is who he is while I had to prove and provide information to show that I am being honest. He had personal details about me and I knew nothing about him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 2:48pm
Geez - I'm ON YOUR SIDE. I am telling you what I read from an outside perspective. I think you have right to be ticked. I was annoyed when I got the same BS. But people like that are not worth getting ticked about. When he said all that stuff, you just say, "well, I guess we're not on the same page. thanks and good luck." Why get all bent out of shape about it?

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2006
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 9:47pm
Sorry if I put you on the defensive. Maybe my original post was conveyed in a different light than I intended. Anyway, its past, hes history. I was nerved at the time but now its forgotten. Thanks for your feedback.