We met, now what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2003
We met, now what?
1
Fri, 06-17-2005 - 8:45pm
I'm puzzled...maybe you can help! I've been trying this online dating thing and have as by at least 7 guys to meet. Each initial "meeting" seems to go well. They eveb tell me I look better in person then my picture. Then, the next day I usually get an e-mail from the guy telling me that he had a good time and hope we can do it again. Out of those 7 guys only 2 have have asked me out a 2nd time and usually its not planned, just sort of spur of the moment. What's up with that? How come guys don't ask girls out on a REAL date anymore? If I really like the guy, what can I do to insure that I get a 2nd date? (Is this common, to meet and then disappear?) I've always been taught that guys like to be the one to pursue but should I ask them out? Because of past experiences asking guys out and then them not seeming so interested, I usually wait for the guys to ask me out. Any advice on this situation would be appreciated!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2005
Fri, 06-17-2005 - 11:31pm

Welcome to the board and the world of online dating. Yes. It's very common to have a seemingly good date only to never hear from the guy again.

Just check out this link: http://members.tripod.com/cl-jhoover21-ivil//id64.html

Also check out this one: http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlcyber&msg=7195.1&ctx=128

Regarding your questions....If a guy calls you at the last minute and doesn't make the effort to plan a date in advance, his interest level is probably not that high.
If you really like a guy the only thing you can do is be yourself. You can't make someone more interested than they already are. In other words, you can't get a guy to ask you out if he doesn't want to go out with you again. (Here's another link for you: http://members.tripod.com/cl-jhoover21-ivil//id75.html)

My advice would be to just keep doing what you're doing. Online dating is a numbers game. Don't pay too much attention to the "success" stories these dating sites advertise. The reality is that the majority of people will meet a whole lot of people before they end up in a relationship. Out of 14 men I met online only 5 went past the first meet - and yeah - I also heard a lot of "I'll call you" and "We should do this again" etc. Don't worry. What you're experiencing is normal.