well travelled?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2005
well travelled?
16
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 11:46am

I've noticed that this seems to be a big thing in dating. People always area throwing out there, oh i'm well travelled, or someone might gush about a possible mate, he/she is well travelled, has been all over the world,lived in Europe, etc. I know everyone is different about what they look for, but why is it that people always think 'well travelled' is impressive? I personally could care less if someone is well travelled. To me it's not about where someone has been or where they're from, it's where they're at. I have met plenty of jerks who have lived in different parts of the world, travelled all over for work, pleasure etc. If anything i have found that these 'well travelled' people seem to think they are better than those who havent travelled much. Again, i dont think travelling makes someone better. I know plenty of people who havent travelled much who know a lot about other cultures, are smart, have great jobs. I guess I just dont get what is so fascinating about 'well travelled' lol. I have been all over the US, been to different parts of Europe, these experiences were great, but they havent made me who i am today. I wouldnt expect someone to find me more attractive because of this, just as I cant imagine ruling someone out because they hadnt left the US or even new england! Most peopel have been out of state these days...

LOL, i guess i'm just tired of looking at profiles that say, well travelled or people looking for someone who is well travelled, blah blah blah.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: corbeach
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 12:40pm

Well, just goes to show, as you say, different strokes for different folks! Well-travelled is pretty much a requirement for me. I do think that traveling has the potential to make you a better person (which is different from thinking that I'm better than other people, and definitely not everyone takes advantage of the potential) and my travels have definitely played a HUGE part in making me the person I am today. Huge. I wouldn't be who I am today without the travel I've done and the experiences I've had all over the world. I feel I am my best self when I am traveling, actually--I'm more open, more curious, more adventurous, etc. So I do it as much as possible and I need a partner who "gets" that, especially since I own a travel business!

So I'd say that people probably put that in their profiles not so much to be impressive, but to attract someone who feels the same way they do about travel. It's a compatability issue.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2004
In reply to: corbeach
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 5:26pm

Cor, I'm with you, but my issue is the "must be a risk taker" guy. He bungie cord jumps, sky dives, drives his Harley without a helmet, blah blah blah. I'm a pathologist. I don't want to do those things. As I tell my young nephews "respect the skull, it protects the brain".

I don't know...there is so much drivel in personal ads, written without much thought or imagination. Lots of men here want a woman to take long walks on the beach with them. I live in Indiana. We don't got no beach.

sigh..

Chick

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
In reply to: corbeach
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 6:10pm

I don't mind too much if they are well-travelled. But I feel like a, um, housewife. How could I travel when I was left home alone with two little kids? SHould I say I would LIKE to travel but can't much because I'm a parent? Or that I do like to travel with my kids? Or that I'd prefer a B and B in wine country to a European tour? i would hate to think anyone was judging me based on my travel resume or my travel ambitions.

Yes, I'd love to travel with a great guy. But the reality is, I'd like to get up every morning and do the breakfast dishes with a great guy, and IMHO that is a lot harder to come by than someone who can travel.

sooooobig
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
In reply to: corbeach
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 6:16pm

Agree with NWW.

Avatar Image"The Small Peanu
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
In reply to: corbeach
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 10:11pm
I completely 'get it' Sheri! I just spent my last date with a guy comparing pics we both took in costa rica and having this awesome energized converation about all of the (similar) experiences we both had there seeing the rainforest, hot springs, volcano, etc. we kind of got to relive it again. I definitely need a guy who wants to travel around and go on adventures with me. It's more about an energy level and curiosity about the world.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
In reply to: corbeach
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 8:49am

My opinion, for ME ... is that I like when someone is well traveled. It is a PRIORITY in my life to be able to travel, specifically out side the country.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2006
In reply to: corbeach
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 12:24pm
I also agree that having travel interests in common is important for developing a relationship. M and I travel together a lot, (Mex. 3x, So. Cal, and once to Phoenix, all in the 4 mos. we've been together) it was a key issue for him since he travels for work so much and enjoys travel for pleasure as a part of his life on a regular basis. He couldn't be with a stay at home type person, wouldn't be able to spend much time together. Our mutual love of skiing and our discussion of our travels involving skiing brought us together in the first place. Just last night, M and I were booking a flight to FL (he wants me to meet his mother- yikes!) and putting together our first ski trip for mid Dec. We've been able to work our travels around our respective custody schedules so we haven't had travel w/o kids issues. Plus my S18 is fine to leave at home on his own. 3 Month Fling Guy grew up overseas, he said he wouldn't date someone who never left the town they grew up in because he has found that his view of the world is so different from someone who hasn't had those kind of experiences, and especially someone who doesn't desire those kinds of experiences. So, I guess I'd say be true to yourself whether an avid traveler, occasional traveler, or stay close to home person. There are plenty of each type in both genders.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2006
In reply to: corbeach
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 1:39pm
I agree, people are way too wordy. I like to do something different.
I find doing something different works. I send acquaintenances Message Plants.
It's a plant that blossoms with a secret personalized message. I saw it at message-plant.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2005
In reply to: corbeach
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 1:48pm

*shrug*

i gues everyone is different. For me i think it's great if someone has had opportunities to travel...but it's not going to make me like them any more or less (:

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
In reply to: corbeach
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 2:21pm

I couldn't disagree with the original post more.

I don't know what kind of travel expereinces you've had (short? touristy?), but the travelling I've done HAS been life changing and HAS shaped who I am, and I expect the same thing from a mate.

Perhaps that's because I don't travel as a tourist. I don't think anyone who has visited Europe and stayed in hotels (or even hostels) for less than two weeks IN ONE SPOT is "well travelled"...thats not well travelled, thats a TOURIST, big deal.

I've never been overseas to Europe , but I am still well travelled-

I am well travelled because I've lived with families, because I've been outside touristy locales and because I worked, volunteered and got my hands dirty with locals- locals who i formed deep, meaningful (ie not touristy) relationships with.

I am well travelled because I understnad the ecological and economic impact of the Blue Mountain in jamaica, and the psychological distresses of norther Mexicans in deciding to make a run on the border or let their children starve.

I'm well travelled because I know the differences in dialects between Argentinians of German descent and Argentinians of Indo descent- and how that can negatively or positively impact their employment opportunities.

I don't think that those who haven't BEEN there "know a lot about other cultures"- they might know textbook crap about other cultures, but trust me there is absoultely no way they honestly, truly KNOW people, the heart of a culture is its PEOPLE. You can't know people from a textbook.

There is no way on earth I would have married a mate who wasn't as well travelled IN THIS WAY - NOT A TOURISTY WAY- as I am....

I don't know if that's snobby or not, but to me it has a lot to do with education. Being educated. gettting out of your comfort zone- which you have to do when you get really into other cultures, bends you, grows you as a person.

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