what are the old rules anyway?
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| Tue, 06-07-2005 - 10:21pm |
Just wondering, hoping someone can enlighten me. What are the basic rules? At what point would you say you are old? Is there such a thing? Can you guess I'm new?!! I've been chatting with this guy for a bit, about 2 months. At first we just chatted about nothing really, I was kind of seeing a guy where I live. Then things didn't work out with him and I and I talked to the oline guy about it. Seemed fine, no problems. I thought we were just chatting but about 2 weekes later I find out that he's looking for more. I didn't give him a second thought b/c he's 7 yrs younger than me but is very mature. There are times when he's more mature than me, lol. Anyway, over the last couple of weeks, maybe 3 weeks i guess, he's told me several times that he really likes me and is looking for a serious relationship and wants to settle down. He's 23 on Monday and he wants to settle down. He lives in Maine and I live in Nova Scotia, Canada. He doesn't seem to think it's an issue. I asked for his # last week and he actually gave it to me. I haven't called. He asked for mine last night, said he would have asked sooner except he didn't want to rush things. We're planning to meet this summer. I think it's too soon, but maybe I'm just scared. This is the first time I've ever done anything like this and my friends think I've lost my mind. My b-friend refuses to talk to me about it. You guys are all I have at this point to tell me what this is all about.
Also, I look forward to talking to him everyday. However if I don't log on at a certain time then we don't chat that day. i hate that. I'm changing or bending to meet his schedule so we can chat or so it seems. Today for example, I couldn't be here at 3 pm so we didn't chat and we won't b/c he won't be on tonight. he's off work with a shoulder injury so he's home all day healing. Maybe I'm wrapped up into this more than I should be. When I fall I fall head over heels and I think I hit my head on the way!!! He and I click somehow. We've seen pics of each other, I think I've seen him. This is confusing, it's so hard to trust this stuff.
Help please. sort this out from me. I'm too new to this.
Thanks,
LittleRocket

Welcome Rocket!,
This is THE place to find out the 4-1-1 on OLD!
I don't mean to point out red flag-age(things to watch out for, as they develop), but Why can't he be online, if he is home with an injury? If someone has a time constraint like that, it's gotta make ya wonder?...is that when someone comes home that should Not see he is chatting online? Don't want to rain on your parade, but one has to develop a little bit of "online street" smarts, to make it on Planet OLD.
Also, if you are just beginning, DO try to find people who live within a reasonable distance from you, so you can have a 'normal' dating life. This does not mean rule out people in other states/countries, but hey, dating is hard enough without adding Many miles to the equation.
Be realistic and optimistic. Also, don't 'stop" on this guy, you are too young and too cool! Date a few at a time,or, at least, go out and meet, that way. Don't be too quick to narrow down your dating vision, right away. This Is a great way to meet good people, but read here, ask here and learn here..these are great people! I met my Tall Man a little more than 3 months ago, and he is the Man, but I still go day by day!
Good luck!
truly,
Cupcake
First the lecture: my dear, why on earth are you thinking of getting involved with someone from another country?! The only possible healthy relationship to be had is when two people can be together physically, and on a regular basis. All else, all information shared over the net, is pure fantasy and steeped in self-interest. This is experience talking.
For your own safety, peace of mind and personal fulfillment (sp?), please end the chatting with this fellow and find someone in your own city. When I was in Nova Scotia last September, I recall the men there were pretty hot. Especially Halifax - gotta love those University towns, eh?
If you are determined to see this young boy (meow), check out the Long Distance Relationship board on iVillage. A couple of weeks of reading all the whinging and complaints and loneliness should pull off those rose-coloured glasses of yours.
About your post: I don't like the idea that he is home all day because of an (alleged) accident. I also don't like the fact that you only chat when it's convenient for him. Something's off there. Please be cautious and DO NOT believe everything you read on the net!!
I wish you all the luck in the world and I hope I've helped you decide to find someone you can have a regular life with!
amjay
Hey thanks for the info. I guess I saw a lot of those things but I wanted a second, third, fourth, etc opinion from some people who know more about this than me. He says that he is working in his shop at night and that is when he comes in. You know everytime I ask about something he always comes up with such a valid excuse. I haven't heard from him in a couple of days, he says he's having problems with his business and his son's mother. So who knows. He's kinda cute, I think.
I appreciate the advice. As for men here, there's none, and I mean that. Online there are none close and to be physically here and see what's around, there are not any prospects that aren't married. It gets expensive running to Halifax all the time as well.
Someone will cross my path when the time is right.
Ciao for now,
littlerocket
Edited 6/10/2005 4:27 pm ET ET by lilrocket
Edited 6/10/2005 4:30 pm ET ET by lilrocket
Hi. Could you please edit your post #4 to delete reference to the fellow's online name? It's a policy not to name names because we had some problems before.
Have you tried match.com? People have had great success on that one. You don't have to pay right away, just whip up a profile, start browsing and send out some "winks".
Good luck to you!
amjay
I think I edited right. I don't see the name there either so no one else should be able to either right? Ooooppps on my part. Wasn't even thinking when I wrote it. Thanks for catching that.
Littlerocket
thanks, it worked!
amjay