What are the Positives?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
What are the Positives?
11
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 11:02am
I know we all can speak about the negatives of Online Dating but I'd like to know what folks here see as the positives of it... So please, share away!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 11:22am

I'd like to say something

heather 5-18-10
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 12:32pm

Well, to paraphrase the old George Thoroughgood song, if it wasn't for OLD, I wouldn't have no dates at all, so that's definitely a positive for me!

It enables me to meet men I would never get a chance to meet in my day to day life.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 7:38pm

The thousands of views and hundreds of emails and winks were a real ego boost, though a tad addicting!

I was active on and off for about 8 months, was picky on who I actually met....picky in that I had to feel a connection and a genuineness to the profile, if that makes sense. A couple guys I would of been interested in meeting, but they hunt (dealbreaker). I talked with a few on the phone that I didn't meet.

I went out with 3 guys, all seem to be genuine, good guys. First was a really nice guy, we went out twice in 1 month, had a lot in common, talked on the phone several times between dates and after 2nd date, but both our schedules were really hectic and I had a lot going on personally, unfortuately it sort of fizzled out.

Second guy, we went out 3 times in a 2 month period, emailed regularly between dates, because of my schedule, I wasn't availble to date that often. He was really nice guy, we enjoyed each other's company a lot, but I wasn't physically attracted to him.

Third guy, we've been together for 5 months. We both have hectic schedules, so we are slowly getting to know each other, growing closer, lots of physical chemistry and emotional is catching up. There is potential here. We've hit 40, both have been hurt (who hasn't!), so I think we both have had our guard up...but we talk about issues when they come up...and we are starting to say what we need, and the other person comes through...it's pretty cool!

So my experiences w/ OLD have been positive...I've chosen who I want to meet becasue I am interested in meeting THEM, not just meeting to have another meet. This is what has worked for me.

Also, I cut the guys some slack, and don't expect them to say, do, be perfect...I'm not! And I'm learning to ask for what I want and need...it's amazing how well that works!! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 7:42pm

I agree with Sheri. The advantage of OLD is that it lets you meet people you might not otherwise meet and it makes it possible for us to have more dates than we might otherwise. This is true for men as well as women.

Elsa

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Sat, 08-19-2006 - 5:22pm

It is pretty entertaining sometimes to say the least! :-) On the serious side, it has given me the opportunity to meet people I would have never crossed paths with otherwise.
Stephanie

PS After 4 years I finally did meet somebody decent!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2006
Sat, 08-19-2006 - 6:08pm

I hadn't been able to meet available men who wanted to date. I discovered they were all online.

I 'm going out and having fun with the company of a male, instead of with my girlfriends all the time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2006
Sat, 08-19-2006 - 8:43pm
I have had a very positive experience with OLD. I have meet a probally 5-6 men in person, all of which were educated or successful, nice decent people. Usally things fizzeled just because of differences in personality or chemistry. But to this day I have never gone out with someone from OLD who I would warn my best friend against dating. I have been seeing one guy for a little over two months now. My biggest compaint is just that our schedules conflict severly and I have not been able to see him much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2005
Sun, 08-20-2006 - 5:19pm

The positives? It's like eBay, really. You shop and shop, sometimes you get a dud, so you return it and continue shopping. But truly (in all seriousness), I like that it's basically an effective way of meeting a broad range of people. I can look at photos before we meet and not have the awkwardness of turning someone down face to face.

I'm also not one to hit the bar or club scene and my friends aren't the type who'd set me up on blind date (thank goodness). It's convenient and mostly painless, but does take patience and a sense of humor.

I know he's out there somewhere. In the meantime, I'm just enjoying myself and not taking things too seriously.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Sun, 08-20-2006 - 8:36pm

>A different mix of people that you woudn't normally meet in everyday life/social circles.
>easy elimination since you can read their profiles/view personalities (also a negative since they could be lieing)
>quicker look into compatibility since you view their interests/hobbies, etc

In the end , I found the city/age group on the online dating sites were not for me. I dated a lot off of Yahoo Personals and Match.com/.... kept finding non committal dudes that were looking for a huge dating pool where they didnt' have to ever committ. But,I have heard of success stories, but mainly have been with people who dont' meet anyone in day to day life and are on the more shy side ...

I think other areas are a little better than mine for online dating,but again i think its just what your preference is....

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 1:40pm

I am glad that online dating is available for someone like me. I like the convenience of being at home and looking at profile on my own time. The accessability is great too. But I think people should remember that online dating sites are just venues to meet people. It's really the folks one meets which can make dating heaven or hell.

In my case, I met plenty of men. I had preferences and was choosey. I met ok guys, guys who are JERKS (plenty of them out there), and guys who are good. A year later, I met this guy who was just right. So far, we're a good, comfy fit. And that's what it's about --- finding someone who fits you for who you really are. And yep, to surely takes time and it got pretty depressing/frustrating at times.

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