What to do?
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What to do?
| Sun, 04-24-2005 - 9:31am |
I have never been the type to meet people that I talk to online. But lately I have been receiving IM's from men from around the surrounding area that I live. Some nice, some not so nice. However there is one I wouldn't mind meeting. But when I think about meeting him, I starte to wonder what is wrong with myself that I can't find anyone in the area that I live in and begin to wonder why I'm not meeting more people. Although I know the answer to that, it's because I work during the day and I'm too tired to go out at night because I have to get up early the next morning, and then there are the weekends and I work then as well. The only days I have off to do anything is on Sunday, and at that point I'm catching up on stuff I need to get down around the house. The problem is definitely not me making enough time for myself, but instead making time to visit with others. So I guess my question is how normal is it to meet someone online? I'm somewhat new to this whole thing and am just curious?

OK, I am being slightly sarcastic here but do you live under a rock? Do you not watch TV, read newspapers and magazine and Internet articles that in the last several years are chock full of stories of online dating websites, people meeting through online dating, online dating dangers/scams, success stories, new OLD sites, OLD site reviews, discussions of pros and cons of each one, lawsuits of one OLD site against another, services you can use to investigate those you meet online... shall I go on? OLD is a very prevalent medium to meet people in today's electronic society. Many people are too busy or too tired or too something to meet someone through "regular means".
Many of us out here have been doing OLD for months or even years. Not a single one of us is "abnormal" or a "freak" because we chose to use OLD sites to try to meet a potential mate. There are several current success stories of people in long-term (or a few months at the very least) relationships with people they have met online. It might seem like a weird thing, but it isn't. There is nothing wrong with you because you can't meet someone in another way. OLD simply provides you an easy way to meet greater numbers of people.
However, I find this interesting. It doesn't sound like you are on an OLD site. Are these guys just IM'ing out of the blue? That seems a little odd and like you should be more wary. Without an OLD site, you don't get to see a profile or a picture or have an organized method of communication. Also, you'll find that most people that have been doing OLD for a while find IM and email a poor method of communication - you only get to hear what they want you to. You don't get to know this person other than what they want you to know - they could be a good, genuine person like they portray or they could be any level of liar, scam artist or worse. It may sound pessimistic, but it is more realistic. It is important to be safe. If you are interested in meeting one of these guys, you should meet in a neutral PUBLIC location such as a restaurant or coffe place. If you feel that you would let your inhibitions down at all, don't drink alcohol on the first meet. Make sure a friend or family member knows where you are going and a way to get a hold of you and has all the information that you can give about him. Don't go to his house or invite him to yours until you have met him a couple times and feel comfortable with him.
Good luck.