What do you notice first?
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What do you notice first?
| Sun, 08-27-2006 - 7:20pm |
Okay...clearly the photos are likely the most eye catching feature on most profiles, but after that, where do you go next? Do you head straight for the essay, or do you check out all the photos first before reading on?
I've noticed lately (after looking at the picture), my tendency of checking out height next (I realize that may sound shallow, but I do need someone taller than me). After that, does he have kids?. If that looks okay, I proceed to his "About my date" section. If I think I may fit into his parameters, I read the essay.
So what are your "visual patterns"?

Very good & interesting question Happy:
I had to ask myself the question about what it is that I notice first: There are my answers as to what I honestly look for:
1-I guess what I really notice first are the pictures. Yes .I think most of us notice them first ... I am may be shallow but I believe that I am” truthful shallow person”. Beside, I figure I have made an effort to put a picture up so I appreciate seeing one too.
2- Smoking habits: If he smokes that's a major deal breaker for me even if he's hotter than 007.
3- The person's profile text: I look for originality, positivism. I also look out and get away from guy's that would write things along the lines of: "Looking to a trophy wife. Seeking eye candy to spoil myself and show off to my pals." I am exaggerating but I am sure that you get my point.
4 - General interests: I look for balance here. Its fine to be a sport fan for instance, but he must be capable of doing and like doing other activities too.
5- The age factor: I am 30 years old: I Seek a man who is between 32 & 42 years old tops
6- Religion and languages: Even if I don't practice my religion all that often, I still believe in its morals and principals. I would feel more comfortable knowing that the man, I could be in relationship with further on, was raised Catholic faith too. Also, being Canadian, I was raised in both languages by a Francophone mother, who is still not really comfortable with the English language and by a bilingual dad from an Anglophone family. Its sound silly but I would not want a language barrier to form between my mom and "boyfriend" I would want the both of them to be able to communicate freely and naturally.
The last 2 elements are secondary and 2,3 and 4 are the most important
W.
Edited 8/28/2006 9:36 am ET by funnywinnie10
Here is a pattern that I follow when looking at a profile if I liked the pic.
1- Height >= 5' 10'' I proceed to Next point
2- Smoker = No I proceed to Next point
3- Education >= College I proceed to Next point
4- Children = No I proceed to Next point
Anything else is secondary and not that important. Unless there is a red flag in his "About me" section
For me all four points are deal breakers if not met. I ve never dated a man with kids so I dont know whether I m missing out on potentially "the one". But I personally think having kids will affect our relationship negatively since I will have more time than he can dedicate to the relationship.
Thanks for sharing. It’s really interesting to see other people criteria...
Reading you last post made me realize the importance of someone's education. I believe that the way in which a profile text is written is also a good indicator of that "factor" too.
When I turned off my PC last night, I realized that I forgotten to mention a factor for which I have is some sort of a "guilty pleasure"; I tend to look for European men with delight. Because, I find that the accent of a Frenchman speaking English is oh so sexy ;-). However, experience has taught me that most of them do smoke.... Which is a big bummer and a deal breaker.... Oh well! C'est la vie, as they say.
Have a nice Monday
W.
1. Look at ALL the pics
2. Height & age
3.
Hi R,
I am “almost glad” to realize that I am not the only one to have this type of contradiction. Thanks to your comment I feel less odd.... a little less that is ;-)
PS: I just read your other post: I am very happy that you had a great time on your date over the weekend.
Take care.
W.
Well, I DO look at the ones that don't have pics but I find I'm more critical with those. Then:
2) Their age
3) Their marital status
4) Their height
5) What body type, hair color, etc. they are looking for
6) What their summary says
Jennifer
all pics first, then:
age
smoker/non-smoker~smoker is a deal breaker
education & income(no I'm not $$ hungry, just don't want to be with someone who's struggling~I have my own issues as a single Mom, ya know?)
height
what body type THEY are looking for
if they date someone with children that live at home
then I read the essay
FIRST pics; then
smoker or non/smoker
height
age
children
college
income
his requirements - mainly body type (if I fit)
review his pics again (just to be sure)
then essay..... If it's lengthy I scan it or don't read at all (especially if he is one of those poetic brothas). I hate all that poetic stuff!
Since I run a filter on my searches, I have already limited the factors of smoking (no smoking), height (my height and under), age (my age and younger), and body type (slim, atheletic, average) to what comes up.
1. Photo - sometimes all of them if it's only a head shot or an obvious studio or older photo. I want to see what the whole body (see if she matches what I consider as "average/slender/athletic") and a recent photo.
2. Essay - what they are saying about themselves, their interests, what they are looking for. There has to be some matches in this. If she is into watching football or 4 wheeling then I give her a "pass." If she is looking for a Mr FixIt or a real outdoorsy guy then I give her a "pass."
3. Politics - if they are Conservative then I give her a "pass."
4. Income - if she is making 6 figures then I most likely give her a "pass" because she will have a LOT more options (e.g. travel) than I would have in order to spend time with her. Less money than me is not an issue.
5. Kids - if she has kids at home then that's OK. If she has kids out of the house (I'm 53 yo, non-custodial dad of a 13 yo & 17 yo) then I see that as a potential mismatch because she's ready to step out after raising them and I am still spending time and energy as a dad.
Mark