What would you do?
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What would you do?
| Wed, 03-09-2005 - 9:14am |
This really hot dude just sent me this really nice email. He's 8 years younger than me (him 27, me 35). Here's the thing. He'd be absolutely PERFECT for my kid sister!!!
Should I tell him that? Would that be insulting? I totally adore his photo and profile, but I think we are in different places. Should I just say that? Honestly, is there a way to hook him up with my sis? Anyone ever try that? Even if not, any take on this?
JAYME

I guess your sister doesn't do OLD? Maybe she can set up a profile on the site and send him a wink.
I don't think there would be anything wrong with you telling him that you think he'd be great for your sister, but not if she doesn't have a profile. He might want to make that judgement for himself.
City,
I'd give him a chance. My 2nd ex is only 28 and I'm 39. Other than her depression issue at the end, we we're a really good couple despite the age difference. You won't know until you meet.
TT
LOL Well, he's attracted to you. Odds are you and your sister have some things in common, so he might well be attracted to her, to.
I'd suggest giving it a shot- why not? If you do and it doesn't work, she (and you and him, for that matter) are all exactly in the same spots as you are right now. (I'm assuming you aren't into him, for whatever reason.)
You should check with your sister first, of course.
I'd suggest writing him something along the lines of "hey... listen, this is going to sound a bit strange, but bear with me, this is weird for me too because I've never done this before!"
"I am afraid you and I are not a match, but I have an extremely good deal for you. Instead of me, it's like a younger, sexier, cooler version of me, and I think she'd be a great match for you- and you for her. Hey, I could be wrong! But I know this because we share a ton of the same genes- it's my younger sister! Here's her email address, and if it's okay I'll give yours to her. Also, here's a picture of her... good luck!"
You could probably put it like that, maybe a bit more of a hard sell or maybe a bit less. The main thing you want to get across is that you don't normally do this (because no guy wants to see someone who's such a loser that they're always getting set up by their older sister), that you are definitely not a match for him, and that your sister is a lot like you but probably a better potential match for a variety of reasons (primarily age).
Good luck, and be sure to let us know how it turns out! :)
Hi Jayme,
Have you ever dated guys younger than yourself? I was set against it at first, but through OLD have found I actually like the somewhat younger ones better than the guys my age and older. I'm 45 and mostly date guys in their later 30's. The guy I have been seeing now for 1.5 months is 37 (so 8 years younger than me) and so far it's been really nice.
But if you're not into younger guys at all, then go for it and tell him about your sister. Nice guy had some good ideas of things to say to him and I think I would stress that this isn't something you normally do. Have you asked your sister about this or had her view his profile yet - I think I'd do that first before emailing him with her info.
Interesting....keep us posted....
Sunshine
Hey - just cuz she's younger doesn't make her sexier or cooler than city gal here!
I don't think you need to put yourself down any, but if your sister is a lot like you (looks, personality, etc.) and the main thing holding you back is age or if you just feel like your sister would be a better fit, then yeah, go for it and just say something about how you don't usually do this but that you thought your sister seemed like a better match for him than you.
Just make sure you check with your sister first! She may not agree with you that he'd be a good match.
Vexer I was thinking the exact same thing when I read what Nice Guy said! Glad you said it - the little sister certainly isn't sexier or cooler just because she's younger!!!
Sunshine
>>the little sister certainly isn't sexier or cooler just because she's younger<<
(Rolling eyes) *I* didn't say that, either. The point I was making is that she should tell the guy that she isn't a match, but her SISTER is, or might be.
RIF. I didn't say "sister is sexier and cooler BECAUSE she's younger", I said "she's younger, sexier, cooler". Those commas take the place of the word "AND".
"Younger" is just ONE of the reasons she's a better match.
Obviously the age thing is important to her, because SHE BROUGHT IT UP. Therefore, "younger" is perfectly fair to put in as a factor for why her sister is a better match.
And I'm not saying that the sister IS necessarily "sexier" or "cooler" (for any reason, young, old, whatever); I'm saying that's how she should try to SELL this guy on the idea that the sister might be a match.
Are you guys all so self-conscious about your age that you immediately jump to the wrong conclusion about anything/everything any time anyone mentions it? Sheesh.
No, it is because in a post or an email, it is difficult to HEAR your inflection. That may be what you intended to say, but it reads as if you are saying that the sister is younger, sexier and cooler not my sister is (insert your adjective here)-er than I am and better fit. And BTW - I did read it. You did say "Instead of me, it's like a younger, sexier, cooler version of me, and I think she'd be a great match for you-" I take that as you saying that she is a younger, sexier, cooler version of city gal. Forgive me for not reading between the commas.
Oh and you are not looking at emoticons again. See the wink? That means teasing.
Sheesh, talk about defensive! (rolls eyes back)
Edited 3/9/2005 3:34 pm ET ET by vexer_hw
Nice Guy,
This is what you said, "...Instead of me, it's like a younger, sexier, cooler version of me, and I think she'd be a great match for you- and you for her..." Maybe you didn't state it how you were thinking it, but it does come off as though she is all of those things and therefore making the older sister what - old, not-sexy, and un-cool? Yeah, I think a lady might take some offense to hearing that.
If I was self-conscious about my age, then I'd be with the safe old farts and not guys somewhat younger than myself! Now who's jumping to conclusions!
I do realize the main point you were trying to make is that she should tell the guy that she isn't a match, but her SISTER might be. Hey Nice Guy, I usually like most of what you say! ;)
Sunshine