When they don't have a pic
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When they don't have a pic
| Wed, 10-26-2005 - 1:38pm |
How do you handle winks when they don't have a pic on their profile?
I'm so sick of it, I just send an email with a blunt "got a pic?".
Is that just too rude? I just don't have the energy to send anything more tactful.


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how about this...
this guy sent me his spamed email. In that email, he was 35, but his profile says he's 37. He apparently forgot to update his spam email that he wrote it 2 yr ago. Talk about laziness. Gosh! I hate duplicated emails.
I just delete the winks/emails/icebreakers if..
1. He does not have a pic on profile.
2. He hid his profile and contact me.
3. He sent me a spam email
4. His profile includes how fabulous his life is...I've been to 50 countries, have an MBA, own a company, go to the gym 5x awk, blah blah blah...
It is extremely nauseating to read some of the narcisistics profiles.
Puleeeeeze! anyone who flaunts his assets at me is completely unattractive. I'd think he's got some issues.
5. He's divorced or separated.
6. He has kids.
7. He lives more than 50 miles away.
8. He is younger than 21 or older than 35.
9. He has a long list of requirements.
10. I am not attractive to him physically.
I mention above on my profile and they still send me emails/winks/icebreakers.
I used to be polite and reply back nicely,but now I don't even bother.
I just hit the delete and I put their screen names on block list so they can't email or wink at me.
I know..that is not nice but hey...at least I know who I want to date.
Wow, I guess online dating just isn't for me. I have friends who routinely cruise the online personals to laugh at people - therefore I DO NOT have a picture up (I have a backstage on my lavalife profile). I send pictures with any email that I send, and if a guy winks or emails me, I respond right away with my photo. Is that not good enough? It's simply not true that anyone looking at match.com is in the same position as someone who posted, and that bothers me.
That being said, if a guy without a photo emails me and says he doesn't have one, he's history.
If a guy sent me a picture, and I wasn't attracted, I would still write him and politely decline in a way that was not hurtful.
Can I ask what you say? Give me an example of someone you weren't attracted to, how do you say it w/out saying it? I used this tonight: "Although handsome I don't feel that certain je ne sais quoi but want to thank you and wish you the best on your journey to finding a great connection."
I did this tonight in a nice way but somehow he challenged it. He didn't understand how I could come up with that based on one photo. I hate not writing since they sent the picture.
Thanks,
SP
Edited 11/29/2005 12:39 am ET by small_peanut2005
Okay, let's assume the worst case scenario - you put a picture up and someone you know sees it and has a laugh. So what? That speaks more to their own issues than yours. It's hard but one thing I have learned is that no matter what you do, there will always be SOMEONE who is going to criticize or take issue with it, and if you live your life in fear of that you miss out on a lot.
Sad to say, but there really are a lot of married/attached people on dating sites, and the easiest way for them to hide is to not post a picture. Therefore I and many others are very reluctant to correspond with those w/o pics posted. So, I do think that someone who doesn't post a pic is making their own life harder and limiting their chance of succeeding.
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