Whoa there cowboy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Whoa there cowboy!
7
Wed, 11-02-2005 - 10:49am

Hey ya'll, I know I dropped off the face of the earth again for a while but I had a lot going on the last month and hardly had time to breathe much less post. Let's see, work has been insane, I have an evil new boss, I bought and moved into a house, my other kitty passed away, I had problems with my car, my parents came in town... what else?!? Anyway, after long-toenail guy, I took a break for a bit and then got back out on eHarmony about a week ago. Still active on Match but the only guys winking at me are short, fat, balding Hispanic guys over the age of 40. NONE of which is listes as something I am looking for in my profile. Sigh.

Anyway, I know moving to the first meet quickly is good. But I guess I haven't had a guy move to the first meet quite this fast (at least not one I was interested in meeting). I've been on eHarmony again for about a week. I went through communication pretty quickly with a guy that seems nice, has a good sense of humor and is not unattractive. We got to open communication over the weekend. We exchanged a couple emails on the site and he gave me his phone number and I gave him mine as well. We have not spoken on the phone yet but his last email asked if I wanted to meet up with him for dinner and then go with him to a regular bowling night he has with friends. I am sure I am overanalyzing (I always do) but I am thinking 1) it's a little much for a first meet and 2)it's a little fast. While he put no pressure to meet tonight (said he knew it was short notice and understood if I couldn't make it), any advice on how I should proceed? He said it's a regular Wednesday night thing so I was thinking of saying that yes, tonight is too short of notice, but maybe next Wednesday we could meet for drinks or dinner before the bowling thing and then see how it goes from there. My dad is in town this weekend otherwise I would suggest meeting then but I'll be hanging out with him and doing stuff in my new house. Any thoughts?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2005
Wed, 11-02-2005 - 1:13pm

Hi Vex-


Have you guys met yet?

CL-Truewild1969

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 11-02-2005 - 1:36pm

Hey Jodie! No, this would be a first meet which is why I think that it is a little too much too fast. In fact, we've hardly talked at all - only exchanged a couple emails and not even talked on the phone yet.

I do think he is interested in securing some time with me based on what he's said, but for the first meet, I usually like to have a little less pressure such as coffee or a drink that could lead to dinner but doesn't necessarily have to. I think I will do like I was thinking and just suggest next week for drinks or dinner and then see how it goes from there.

And thanks for the well wishes and welcome back.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
Wed, 11-02-2005 - 2:34pm

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Hey, Vex! I think that sounds like a plan. He's moving way too fast IMO. And I find meeting a guy's friends nerve-wracking even if we've been dating for awhile; I can't imagine meeting them on the first meet!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 11-02-2005 - 10:37pm

Hey Carrie! I made my suggestion to meet next week and he suggested that we plan for the same thing then. I responded back that these first meets have enough pressure on them so why don't we play it by ear. I told him that dinner was fine and that if things go well, it's easy to extend the evening or plan another night to meet but that if things don't go quite as well, no one has to feel obligated to keep up with an uncomfortable night. I didn't want to sound pessimistic, but criminy, I am not ready to meet some guy's friends the first night I meet him! We'll see how it goes.

I just closed communication with a guy who is completely obsessed with soccer (or football as he insisted on calling it even though he is not European). I just wasn't feeling it so I decided it wasn't worth it. This OLD stuff sucks.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 10:52am

Howdy!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 11:35am

Hey Stacey! Glad to see you are still out here too.

That could very well be the case. He seems to be doing things pretty well but seems a little eager! He responded well to my suggestion of doing dinner and playing the rest by ear. So next Wednesday will tell.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 3:09pm

Welcome back Vex!! It's good to see you back on (the) board...even though OLD does suck at times. LOL

Your suggestion was perfect. No sense in putting undue pressure on a situation, especially when it's a first meet. They can be stressful enough. Good Luck!

And congrats on your new house!

Libra