Why aren't they more interested in sex?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Why aren't they more interested in sex?
9
Thu, 02-09-2012 - 4:32pm

Last summer I moved to a larger, more southern, more colleged educated town, and I've been going out a LOT.

sooooobig
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 02-09-2012 - 7:53pm

OMG, maybe these guys actually want to get to know you before having sex!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2007
Thu, 02-09-2012 - 8:50pm

i went out with a guy once who I really hit it off with and we had a great night.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010
Thu, 02-09-2012 - 10:58pm
musiclover12 wrote:

OMG, maybe these guys actually want to get to know you before having sex!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Fri, 02-10-2012 - 1:00pm
Yes, sorry, my title didn't match my post. It isnt that they aren't interested in sex. They don't seem to acknowledge that I have a physical presence!

Two weeks ago I had dinner at a guys house. I was growing tired of his apparent lack of interest so when he greeted me at the door I gave him a big smack right on the kisser! He had sense enough to pucker up, but that was it. We had dinner, sat on the couch, and I got a goodnight hug. He was busy last weekend and I thought that was going to be the end of it...but he called this week to invite me to a dinner party. I'm going over to 'help' get ready. Doubt I'll have a chance to get too flirty OR broach the subject. (shrug)
sooooobig
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 02-10-2012 - 2:36pm

That is kind of odd because they must like you to keep asking you out.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010
Fri, 02-10-2012 - 5:05pm

Soooobig-

Hi. If the guy is still interested, the problem isn't as bad as what I thought. I apologize if my prior post came off as too harsh.

What I am thinking now is that the guy here has inner conflicts. On one hand, he wants you. On the other hand, he has been hurt in the past and is scared of that happening again. This pushes him away--and makes him proceed slowly, more slowly than he himself anticipated.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2007
Fri, 02-10-2012 - 7:55pm
trenner, could the guys be worried about their performance or what kind of expectations will come from have sex so soon? I could kind of see where especially if they were married a long time, they might not be sure how to please a woman they don't know well.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010
Sat, 02-11-2012 - 8:34pm

walker_sam wrote:
trenner, could the guys be worried about their performance or what kind of expectations will come from have sex so soon?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2011
Sun, 02-12-2012 - 8:53am
Men's hormones can change starting in the 40's resulting in lower sex drive. But you're also describing no affection at all which seems extreme even if the guy has equipment failure anxiety or low sex drive.