Why I'm quitting for a while....

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2004
Why I'm quitting for a while....
31
Mon, 02-07-2005 - 8:14pm

Sorry I have not been around the board much lately. I am going to hide my profile and take a break from everything to do with dating for a while.

Today at lunch I had a coffee date that was not online but actually just a blind date that a friend set up for me. It's a girl my friend works with. We met and seemed to have a nice conversation, and I thought it went pretty well. Tonight I get home and I have an email saying she "really likes my personality but I am not her type as far as looks go". Wow -- at least she was honest, huh?

I am so down on myself now I am considering seeing someone professionally to talk to this about. Maybe that would help.

I am just so tired of it all right now. I have seen two of my coworkers get divored and find a great girl only months after. They are both in serious relationships now.

I will try to visit the board more often. You guys are great company and always make me laugh. I will also try to make chat tonight.

Eric

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Mon, 02-07-2005 - 11:04pm

Eric, I have never been able to figure out why you haven't been snapped up already. Easy words, I know, when I'm not doing the snapping, eh? Dating is supposed to be fun. When it starts to hurt it's time to take a complete break and recharge. The best thing about seeing a counsellor is that you will get to know yourself again. When next you enter the arena, you will be better armed.

Good luck to you, and please keep coming back here. I think it will be great therapy (not to mention free) to listen to us all gripe that we can't find anyone!! :):)

Ann-Marie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 12:18am

Hi Eric,

I think many people begin to feel this way right after the total rush of the holidays; January is such a blah month in so many ways...bad weather in lots of places, we spent all of our money Last month, etc. It will be a Good time to do something great for Yourself! being a health coach, I would recommend joining a health club, bicycle group, etc. Not only is the exercise good for your mind And body,but there might be some cute chick in there, just waiting to meet a great guy like you!

As for your recently divorced co-workers, not to 'dis on them, but they juuust might be in rebound relationships where everything looks SO rosy because that person is Not their EX! It Happens! But...I wish them and YOU all the best in the months to come! Hang in there, come 4-1-1 us all here asap and do what is best for YOU right now!

Take care,
Truly,
Cupcake

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2004
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 12:30am
Well I can totally relate. I have taken a few months off from the dating scene. I am still listed but not actively pursuing anything. I was divorced 2-1/2 years ago and still suffer from some insecurities from that. I was mentally abused, cheated on, lied to, etc. I have dated off and on. Right now I am tired of the drama of it all. I am a WAHM to a 5-year-old boy too so I am just focusing on my son and my career. There is so much dishonest and game playing and it is such a shame. I know you can meet good people out there. I have met some good ones and my friend met a real keeper. I guess I am just mentally not ready to commit to the challenge and inevitable drama that comes along with it all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 8:28am
Eric, Hang in there. I agree with the other posters -- can't imagine why you haven't been snapped up yet, except maybe that there is a shortage of quality women in your region. And Cupcake is totally right when she says those other people are in rebounds ... (or that can be our story, at least!) I so know how you feel. Do something you have always wanted to do -- take a class, join a club, or something. I'd tell you to buy new earrings and get your nails done, but that would be a little weird -- what's the male equivalent?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2004
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 9:12am

FWIW Eric-I find your picture very attractive. As we breifly discussed in chat last night I totally support your idea in getting some help. After breaking up with my last sig boyfriend, I found myself deeply depressed and did seek counseling. It helped. Also we mentioned, it is more about attitude then about looks. I think you feel so down on yourself that you are projecting an image of low self esteem. Taking a break is an excellent idea. I am glad you are sticking with us...because I for one, enjoy you.

Please keep us posted on the your journey.

Sincerely,
Jodie




Edited 2/8/2005 10:54 am ET ET by truewild1969

 

http://tickers.ticke

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 10:20am

Eric,

Hope some good karma comes your way. It's never a bad idea to take a break from
time to time when it comes to trying to date and build relationships. Keep in mind,
I've taken my lumps when it comes to dating. One girl I went on a date years ago
called me an Albino. I promptly went home to look in the mirror and suddenly noticed
I had blue eyes. I agree with Jodie that you're a good looking guy. Not that I'm
really into judging guys.... :-) But it will happen eventually. Hang in there.

TT

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2003
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 10:38am

Eric,

I agree with all the other posters. You are a great guy and will be a great catch for the right girl. And when the time is right you'll find her. It may be a good idea to take a break from dating and work on you. If you feel you need counseling then by all means do it. Remember the most important thing is you and how you feel about yourself. Don't let anyone else's opinion weigh on your mind. Like other's have said, we are all drawn to different types of people. We all know what a great guy you are and we are here to support you and help you see it. Hang in there!!

Libra

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 10:58am

Ooooohhh, ouch!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 11:28am

Also wanted to add, as far as seeking professional help:

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Avatar for phoenixmama
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 02-08-2005 - 12:48pm

And here's one more!