Would you/Could you/Should you?
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Would you/Could you/Should you?
| Thu, 09-01-2005 - 1:56pm |
I am curious to know (especially with all the online dating people do today)
Would you ever hire an investigator or have a background check done on someone you were dating? What would convince you to do it Do you think it is an invasion of privacy or justifiable?
If you ever hired an investigator or had a background check done on someone you were dating, what made you think you needed to? What did you find out?

I would
The best indicator of future behaviour is past behaviour.
For instance If I find out that somebody has too many parking fines I would not date them reason being, that type of behaviour tends to lend itself to the belief that rules made for the smooth running of soceity, can be contravened at will. And amount to nothing but an irritant and an inconvenience and I dont want to be around anybody with that way of thinking.
There are chameleons out there, and to make sure my Physical, Emotional and financial wellbeing remains intact, I want to know not only who I am entangling myself with, but also who they have been prior to my entrance into their affairs.
They are also free to do same with regard to me and my past.
I know that if people can fake their way to all kinds of advantages with other women it could happen to anybody including yours truly.
moreover a lot of these baddies cannot help themselves inspite of their best intentions.
so I am not leaving anything to Chance.
I'm beginning to think it should be a requirement or before you are allowed to post a profile online, the company (such as Match or Yahoo) should run a background check to be sure you are gainfully employed, verify that you are single and check criminal/driving records!
I have never done it and if I felt the need to do so, more than likely I would not date them or discontinue seeing them!!
I've never really thought about it, but I think if I was getting the feeling that maybe I should check someone's background then maybe that's a sign in itself!
I didn't hire a PI, but I did pay $40 for an online background check.
My last BF lied about his marital status, AND the guy I checked out was wearing a WEDDING RING in 2 of his 4 pictures (his status was listed as divorced). At first, I didn't do the check. But when I met him, I couldn't relax because I kept thinking about the pics of him with his wedding ring (both pics are of him and his DD... and one was clearly pretty old. The other... wasn't). The date went really bad because I wasn't able to relax.
I finally just asked him , and he said he was separated (the divorced was just from the "drop down" boxes on the site). I ran the check and was satisfied that he was telling the truth, but it didn't matter, because my behavior "disappointed" him.
Anyway, it was money well spent, as far as I'm concerned.